I’m overwhelmed with fear that I will fail
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If I don’t stay hard, how will my partner be satisfied
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It’s so easy to get stuck in my own head and that just makes it impossible to recover in the moment. It’s helped me a lot to not focus on the erection itself and just enjoy all the sensations.
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Fortune telling im going to blow to quickly or loose it going from foreplay to going in
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All or nothing
Disqualifying the positive. When I do something good I take it as a fluke.
If I move, I will dum, it will be over, and she will be dissatisfied.
When he kisses me, i’m focused on my penis
If i dont get hard, then i feel he’ll understand and see it and be disappointed directly
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i hope he doesn’t notice or ask about how i’m not hard. i’ll feel embarrassed.
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My negative thought during my last sexual experience was that as she started touching me I was hard and could feel close, but as soon as i pulled away I became soft. I was thinking the whole time that if I can’t perform she won’t want to have sex with me. She then said this very thing
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My negative thought has always been I won’t be good enough and it engages fight or flight instantly
That I cannot stay hard for them when they are fully hard for me.
That I’m to awkward for my partner and can’t maintain focus to stay hard for them to be into me sexually
The thought that she doesn’t love me or want me every time she rejects sex.
That I wont be able to satisfy my partner or that she will find someone else if I don’t have good sex with her.
That because I struggled getting it up last time I won’t be able to get it up this time
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Just because I have trouble getting hard doesn’t mean I don’t love her
That if I don’t get fully hard it wasn’t a satisfying experience for both of us.
The last time a tried to have sex it was a few months after a break up. I could get it up even though I was attracted to the person and I felt like a should be able to : categorical imperative.
In reality, I wasn’t ready. I may have felt like I needed the physical connection but my emotions and confidence just wasn’t ready. I put a lot of pressure on myself and was unrealistic about what to expect from my body. I now realise I should’ve taken things slowly (which the person even acknowledged but I want to prove my myself and my ‘manliness’)
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Last time I had sex I could get hard during foreplay and immediately panicked and made and excuse as to why I wasn’t. It took me out of the moment and I wasn’t able to focus at all.
The last time I had sex I just could not finish it because I told myself I couldn’t.
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