I imagine my inner critic as the lesser part of me, it seeks to undermine me by voicing self-doubt at unhelpful moments in order to satisfy its own ends, its own comfort, keeping me trapped in a negative cycle of avoiding the potential pain of sexual experience with a partner in favour of the security of porn and masturbation. I have tried to fight this foe. I imagine now I need to befriend him as part of me, but recognise that he is not whole, and cannot make decisions for me.
I’ve been well-aware of my inner-critic for a while; however, I haven’t zoomed in on it and focused on it, in quite some time this has been refreshing!
It’s definitely me and it’s telling me you won’t be able to get it up or keep it up and therefore won’t be able to have a baby or give my wife what she wants and deserves.
I hope I can get it up; can you handle all this; look at how beautiful she is, she is too much for you; you better not mess this up; you have to get it right the first time; you better be flawless in your execution; your perfection justifies whether you deserve her; you must be worthy to have what you really want and you must prove your worthiness by walking this “tightrope” of performance requirements; her pleasure is more important than your own; her enjoyment is more important than yours
My inner critic is my partner’s voice. “Come on, what’s wrong? Why can’t you get hard? I want to get fucked hard.” It’s demanding, wants what it wants.”
I think to myself, “Oh no I’m about to numb out, oh crap I’m about to go down…. There goes sex….”
It’s me telling myself that I hope I can get erect
Honestly, he’s just like me. He uses the phrases “don’t” and “make sure” very often - don’t fuck it up. Make sure you get her off. Don’t lose your erection.
I can tell it’s trying to be helpful, but it’s just a distraction
Hardness
My inner critic is me, a voice telling that I might go limp.
It’s me I’m my own inner critic it’s no one else. I always tell myself “stay hard” and then start thinking my way to keeping my erection up but that’s not how it should be.
My inner critic is my own voice, in my head. Speaking in a bullying tone, dismissive, doubtful negative. The opposite of my real personality. He feels like the old me. The bad me . All black me, black timbs and black hoody me. It feels like a nagging devil on my shoulder reminding me: “don’t fuck up, dont fuck this upppp” turning up the self afflicted pressure.
My inner critic is my voice… it’s very matter of fact.
Neutral, trying to encourage but makes you focus on the negative. It’s my voice. Quiet and near me.
Condescending critic, always something wrong or about to go wrong
My voice but like an older brother picking on me in a sibling rivalry type of way
My inner critic just sits calmly in the back of my head, using my observational voice. It points things out as facts. “You aren’t hard yet. You should be hard. You aren’t even close to getting hard. She’s going to notice you aren’t hard.”
My inner critic is my voice saying that I will not be hard enough during all the sex, so I will end up failing and feeling not good enough.
My inner critic is a judgemental asshole. Always there to bring me down
He’s me reminding me I’m not good enough. She isn’t going to want me. If I can’t take care of her she will leave me. She deserves to be taken care of. Am I going to disappoint her? I’m good at disappointing people…especially myself. Am I going to get it up? If I do will I keep it up? I really want to just fuck the shit out of her and thats what she wants too. We both want the release of good hard fucking but it rarely happens because lately when I do get it up it doesn’t last or I come really fast. Why am I broken. Why won’t my body work. What kind of man am I if I can’t satisfy my girl, and when do I get to feel truly good and in control?