Bad Google search

I was already struggling with performance anxiety issues and then it got worse after a Google search. I searched something like “difficulty with orgasm” and all the results were about women. Article after article talked about how women have difficulty with orgasm. This made me feel like I was a freak and that there really was something wrong with me. The phrase “sexually disabled” took root in my mind. I’m brand new here but one of the most helpful things here is just finding that other men share the same struggles and I am not a man suffering from a “female” problem. Did anyone else ever encounter the same kind of search results? Honestly, it really pisses me off that our challenges are so taboo that they are almost made invisible.

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Unfortunately yours is a very common experience and it pisses us off too! That’s why we created Mojo, so that men like yourself don’t need to feel “disabled”. Struggling with your erections and feeling anxious in the bedroom is completely normal and I hope that we can help you find a healthy way through it :muscle:

Thanks. It turned out that performance anxiety was a much more helpful search term. That’s how I found mojo. Glad I’m here.

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I’m also struggling more with issues climaxing than issues getting an erection. I’m still on the fence about how much of the issue is psychological, and how much is hormonal. I have done a lot of work to improve my testosterone, and that has helped significantly, but after struggling with it for over two years, and knowing I have generalized anxiety, I am definitely interested in ruling out psychological causes of anorgasmia as well.

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In my case, I’m convinced that my problem is entirely psychological because I can get off just fine on my own. I only run into problems in partnered sex. But of course your situation may be different.

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My success rate is much higher by myself, but still not perfect, and still not as good as it once was.
So maybe my issue is partly psychological and partly not. Now
I am jaded about being circumcised, because I need those 20,000 nerve endings they took away :angry:

The first time I spoke to someone about my issues was a doctor. There wasn’t much conversation, they immediately wrote me a prescription for pills and I was on my way. I didn’t know to think about the issue more holistically. Now some time down the line I feel like those may have hurt more than they helped over time.

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Try the ‘Men, Sex and Pleasure’ podcast. This is very helpful and exclusively about men’s sex talk.

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Thanks for the tip.

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It stinks but I think your experience is typical.

I have problems with soft erection and I can’t penetrate. Does anybody else experiences

Google was always my worst enemy always led to something way off topic and not beneficial to me.

I’ve recently noticed a drop in my libido and I really don’t wake up with erections in the morning. On my own I can get erect with physical stimulation and reach completion. It’s very sudden and noticable too, I’ve recently been under a lot of financial stress, and am currently working two jobs. I know full well I’m not at all sleeping properly averaging 2-4 hours a night, I’m also not eating properly at all. Once a day if I’m lucky and it’s usually two protein bars or a salad and sandwich from the store. I’m just wanting to solve this issue.

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I stopped doing this and im continuing to do this 1 hour 2 times a week. I really have a hard time working my game up to just feel sex driven. I love my wife and shes beyond my league but i feel as if its a issue from me watching too much porn and maybe i enjoy seeing different people. I dont watch the same porn video every time. But i have sex with my wife everytime and now it just brings me anxiety because she has a higher sex drive then me

What does it mean if I can only get erect after a week of no ejaculation

I want to have sex, sometimes I feels too lonely that I can’t even share my sexual emotion that I wanna have sex with any girl around me.

Just understanding that this is common and I’m not some weird zoo animal has helped.

My ED started a few months ago. I’m 6’3” and 190 but I do have some health issues. I have to take opiate pain killers everyday for severe neuropathy I have from cancer treatments. I also have slightly high blood pressure but I am in otherwise good shape. I can achieve an orgasm without an erection and I really do think that it’s more performance anxiety than physical but I’m not 100% sure. I’m going to stop watching porn and try to come off my pain meds and I’m going to exercise more to get my blood pressure even lower.

Yes! Mine is more centered around my porn usage. I usually can reach the finish line but it seems to take hours and that’s after many cycles of going from soft to hard. With intercourse, I cannot maintain the erect let alone reach the finish line. This in turn leads to major performance anxiety which causes me to abstain and my partner suffers. We have finally begun to talk about this which has lead me here! We are both very hopeful and excited to see what this new journey can lead to.

I actually stumbled across a tiktok the other day that had a million likes & it said “when you been hyping up your sex game but the time comes and you get performance anxiety”. It was crazy to see the comments & how many people actually experience this and don’t talk about it. It was literally thousands of comments attesting to have had the same issue happen before. I have heard that PE is something that can be cured completely so I’m hoping that’s true and we all leave here better than we came in.