Have you done it before? What was the outcome?
My partner avoids sex. We don’t arouse each other
I think the biggest thing for me is recognising the thoughts & feelings I have around sex. I would avoid sex with my wife a lot & not engage with why I’m not responding to her advances.
Being able to label what I’m feeling has been helpful (eg spectatoring, inner critic, performance anxiety) in unpacking those thoughts to discuss it further with her.
The hardest part is how I’m making my wife feel when I don’t communicate. When I can’t perform it makes her feel rejected & undesired. When I don’t respond to her touch or avoid sex it affects her self esteem & questions if I ever wanted her at all.
I love & want her but my avoidance of sex/intimacy & my actions keep telling her I don’t want her.
I want to break the cycle of how I’m making her feel so low.
With the right person. I can
I’m very fortunate to have great communication in my relationship. Of all the things I’m struggling with, this is the one where I’m shining