I don’t know how much longer I can do this I’m hurting my girlfriend each time we have sex now by going soft. Not even 10 minutes ago she was just crying now we’re gonna go on this 3 day span of not talking to each other then act like nothing happened after
I’ve been there. It is a tough spot to be in. Be kind to yourself. Really give yourself grace. There is nothing wrong with you or your body. Stick with this program and you will build self-compassion and confidence. This will help you extend that same compassion to your partner, and to not take it personally the sadness she is expressing. The module in Mojo about “owning” your issue could be helpful here. To recognize you are actively working to improve an area where you have struggled. Your confident ownership of this could make your partner feel less helpless.
I get that but the past three times we’ve tried it’s happened it’s getting to the point where I’m losing my drive to have sex and I’m trying to avoid it at all cost which is very hard because she’s a very sexual person
I know exactly what you mean. It’s easier said than done, but avoid negative thought spirals. In guys who do not have negative feelings about it, losing an erection is not a big deal. It happens, and comes back. Your negative beliefs about it make it a self-fulfilling prophecy. Keep your head up, you’re ok, I promise.
I totally understand what you mean. While it’s easier said than done, avoid negative thought spirals. In guys who do not have negative feelings about it, it is no big deal to lose their erection. It happens, it and can come back quickly. It’s your negative feelings towards it that can make it reoccur. And for your partner, confidently communicate that it’s not a reflection of her, but rather your own self-judgement that you’re actively working to improve.
Yes…. I’ve been at the “avoiding” to avoid embarrassment or disappointment.
I think this is the really difficult bit.
My ED has improved immensely due to this app… but I’m still finding I’m worrying about how things will go…
So…. I feel for you man…. however…… one of the bits I tried was the “simmering”…. It is part of my “preparation”, I suppose you’d call it. This along with the mediation and box breathing… I’ve come a long way…
Some days if my confidence is low I’ll pop in a Cialis, but it’s not every time… they do help… but the app is stronger in the long run.
Keep the faith and simmer…….