I don’t know what to say anymore.
I’ve recently entered a new relationship with a girl from Uni, and the two nights we’ve been out were great. Unfortunately, after our second night, we haven’t seen each other for three weeks. This is because she was very busy with coursework and dealing with some personal stuff. As a result, not only did we not go out at all, she’s also not been responding to my messages, and would take literal days to actually reply.
Now, look, I’m usually very patient, and I understood that she was going through a tough time, so I was just understanding to her and tried to stay patient until we would eventually go out. Well, unfortunately my patience was crossed, but I somehow held on.
Then last night happened. The night where we would finally meet up again. It was at a Uni society event, so there were others there too. I hung around with my friends as I waited for her to arrive. And then, after two hours, she finally came.
And… what did she do? Well, at first, all seemed well- we hugged, I gave her a kiss and all. But then all of a sudden, she kinda just kicked me away. I was just talking to her, I even had a drink ready for her, and she just shunned me off, left to get “acclimatised” to the area.
Now, look, I don’t know what that was all about, but she hasn’t gone out in a long time, I guess, and maybe the fact that she’s autistic might’ve played a role in it (or maybe not, I know basically nothing about autism so I don’t want to make any assumptions). Nevertheless, I let her have her moment.
Later, I tried talking to her again, and she just wanted “space”. She came to the society event to socialise with the others; fair enough, I came here for that too (but mainly for her). But then she said that I was more of a “bonus”. She said she felt obligated to “entertain” me all the time if I was standing with her while she was socialising with the others.
I had to go for a walk to even process wtf I was dealing with. An hour later, when I returned from my walk, she hasn’t changed. She didn’t come to the society event for me. She came to socialise with the others.
To a certain extent, I understand, because she doesn’t know who her friends are right now. But, I’m sorry, I’ve been waiting for three fucking weeks to see her, waiting full days to get a simple fucking response on Instagram DMs, and when we finally meet, THIS happens?! I’m a fucking “bonus”?!
I feel like God or nature or someone in this world is playing a very cruel prank on me, and I don’t know WHAT to do. I don’t want to break up with her, because I feel extremely lucky that I even managed to go on two dates with her in today’s dating scene which is fucking awful. But at the same time, in two days, I’m leaving for Easter holidays and not coming back for three weeks, so I won’t get to see her, thus not knowing what SHE thinks of “us”. It’s fucking infuriating, and I’ve given up all hope.