Share your story - what has brought you to Mojo?

Having problems keeping erections, it is an anxiety issue. I can’t get out of my head then when i am trying to have sex, thinking about if I may lose the erection at any moment, it has turned having sex into being a big deal which I worry about then which just becomes a vicious circle. I just want to clear my mind and enjoy sex.

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I am 25 and have struggled getting it up for quite some time.My anxiety gets in the way and this has caused me to take a step back from dating at all.

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I am seeing a new girl and everytime we go to have sex my penis will not get erect, it might go a little bit but then right back to normal.

I have been struggling with premature ejaculation for years, and this is now really effecting my relationship. I feel that this pressure is solely on me, and this adds to my anxiety and worsens the situation.

never had a problem until now! got a new girlfriend and just have never really been able to get it up properly even though I am so attracted to her! can’t seem to get it out of my head. I never used to think about it before and I am trying to get back to that feeling.

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Haven’t felt confident getting or maintaining erections in years - starting in my early 20s. As time has passed, that nervousness

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Need to get out of my head. Nothing physically wrong but my mind wanders and I get focused on if it will work

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I have been suffering with performance anxiety while with my long term girlfriend (5 years). It had been an issue throughout our relationship but recently it has gotten worse that sometimes I do not initiate and avoid sex. This has effected our relationship to the point that my girlfriend says that she wants to breakup and the spark has gone. I have come to Mojo to try and find ways to overcome the anxiety and hopefully fix my issue.

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I’ve been dealing with erection issues for 3 years, although I’ve found that the cause is primarily physical, it has had a big effect on my state of mind around sex and “getting it up”. That’s why I’m here.

Na

I had erectile problems that inhibited me so much that I stopped dating for years. I eventually met someone and started dating and gradually my problems went away. Part of the reason was therapy and my counsellor suggested mojo men. I’ve recently split up from that partner and I’m keen to date and make use of my new found liberation from the way I used to think.

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Hoping that mojo will help with my issues, listening to other with their issues, compare situations and find a solution for my problem

Hoping that mojo will help with my issues, listening to other with their issues, compare situations and find a solution for my problem

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I have had issues with performance anxiety quite a lot since I started having sex about 7 years ago. It depends on the situation and what kind of sex we’re doing, if it’s just oral or I’m being pleasured it’s generally stress free, but when it moved onto penetration I would start to get nervous, my thoughts would race and often I would struggle to get out my head. I found if we agreed to leave it and the pressure was off then I could relax and get it back up and have good sex but sometimes it still wouldn’t work which was really distressing. I was really worried that this would stop me having relationships but my last partner was pretty understanding and we had a lot of great sex. I find for me it’s a lot about feeling safe and comfortable with the other person, as well as working on my own self-esteem.

My first time was supposed to be this perfect moment, and when we started for some reason it went down and I couldn’t get it up. We’re long distance so I had this for the whole trip and it made me feel so embarrassed and not worthy for her.

Most of these stories/ exercises etc seem to be about and/or for younger men. Any guys over 60 on here?

My first sexual partner was at age 20 and we were together almost 3 years. She had many partners before me, and I could not achieve an erection on our first night together, nor during subsequent episodes. I was eventually initiated into her world, and we enjoyed many moments of bliss together, and generally had a good sex life. I never shared in her high sex drive, and sometimes felt as though I was only initiating or agreeing to sex to keep her ‘ticking over’. I would often masturbate at home, watching porn, despite knowing i was to see her that same night. I realise now that throughout our relationship I was often struggling to keep an erection, which lead to her feeling that I wasnt attracted to her anymore. This added pressure, along with the feeling that she had been with many people before and all I knew was her, made me feel as though I was trying too hard to please her, and being in my head. I was definitely a porn addict, and throughout my teen years and early adulthood I shared many explicit online mesages, pictures etc with consenting, albeit online, partners. I have not watched pornography for nearly 60 days now as I knew this was also affecting me unconsciously. I am so pleased to be part of this community and have already seen results alone from my first few weeks.

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Performance Anxiety

I’ve been experiencing ED my entire adult life. I made too big a deal about sex from the offset, even purchasing viagra before my first encounter because i was terrified of not getting it up. I’ve always put the activity on a pedestal, always made it seem like a huge thing. I have had relationships that were semi functional thanks to medication but I don’t feel free of this lifelong burden. Even medicated my success is 50/50. So I’m 30 now, I need to think of the next stage of my life, and find a partner long term. I need to address this and stop putting it to rest when the stress is too much. The content here is helpful but I am almost afraid of dating for fear of further episodes.

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I get panick attacky when my partner is on top of me. I sweat a lot and loose my erection.