Hello,
As the title says, I suffer from performance anxiety. Everytime I’m about to have sex (of any form, even the handjob) with my fiancee, my body turns on the fight and flight response. This all developed when we started trying to conceive. The issue is getting bigger as its been a year and we have lost the pregnancy.
I’m trying the app for a week now as I am very anxious generally and I want to try if this helps.
I’m generally very anxious person, with GAD and OCD, and now the anxiety is getting even worse.
Is there anybody who actually managed to improve their situation with PA?
I just need some help and warm words as my world is falling apart. I’m also in therapy to tackle OCD and GAD, but the changes are super slow…
I deal with OCD and GAD which really spikes during sexual situations lately. My advice would be to celebrate the wins as much as possible and it’s know it will get better
Can’t speak to the conception aspect, but what’s worked for me is: I’ve talked extensively with my partner about my issues- making sure it was clear that it’s not her problem. It’s mine. I also suggested that there are ways that she might help. Talking kinda naughty and direct while in bed helps, taking charge sometimes helps, being encouraging and not demanding also helps.
I found that if I get her off a few times with my fingers and tongue, she’s basically jello and takes the pressure off my dick to satisfy her. She says that if I’m able to F her at that point, it’s just extra sprinkles on the sundae!!
I’ve also found that if I lose my hardon, I try not to panic and just rub it on her clit. Her moans and reactions are usually enough to get me going again.
Something I realized this weekend is the sensate focus activity REALLY helps me get fully turned on. This morning she woke me up gently dragging her nails all over my body. It got me really hard and I was able to finish in her mouth for the first time ever!
Sensate focus seems to work for me!!
Good luck man!!![]()
Thank you for the tips
for me the conception part made it all a forceful act because of the ovulation period and I have been spiraling since it happened for the first time last year. There were ups and downs, better times and worse times, I even tried sildenafil but to be honest my anxiety can override it.
Yes! I have definitely experienced improvements.
Before, I would struggle to get hard and stay hard. Now, with the help of meditation mostly, I’m able to get out of my head and enjoy sex more. I’m even able to wear a condom with far fewer issues than before!
I’ve been where you are my friend. But let me tell you that there IS hope and with commitment, things will get better for you.
Stay the course! ![]()
Thanks for the comment! How much time did you spend on meditating before spotting the improvement?
I have ED and GAD.
The meditation and breathing exercises on this app have helped me to relax and reduce my anxiety.
Stay with it, and you will soon get better. ![]()
Thank you, I just hope those exercises can really alleviate the anxiety and the automatic fight or flight response…
Sorry, what’s GAD?
Generalised anxiety disorder.