Need help, can get a erection during foreplay but when it’s time to penetrate its done

Only 23 , last time had sex was 7 months ago took a blue pill and lasted well long enough ; gave me a good confidence back but yesterday I didn’t take nothing. Foreplay was good but as soon as I got done getting head and went to penetrate things, it wasn’t firm enough to penetrate. Tried getting head again and came :joy: any tips? :man_facepalming:

Heavy into PMO since 15-16 for the longest just now getting used to stopping longer than a week don’t know if that has anything to do with it?

It’s interesting because I had this exact issue, unfortunately I can’t help you in solving it :frowning:

What did you do to solve it if you have already?

This is me, kind of. I am 53, and married. I have taken pills, and they have had various degrees of effectiveness. I think I started to use them, while not addressing the real issue and then they ended up not working well.

I could get hard getting head, during foreplay, but when it came time to penetrate, nope. Too soft. Even after taking a pill.

In April, we attempted sex after a long absence from one another. Same situation. The wife said this has got to stop and I need to do something. A week after that, we tried again and had a fight. I have quit smoking, pretty much quit drinking, been more active, etc. to try to help. Nope.

The last 2 times have been successful. Even good.

For me, it’s in my head. My inner critic. That has helped me, so far. I’m still working on it, but now the fear is less and the confidence is growing.

I went into this not even questioning if it work or not. I just have faith and do the work and dismiss negative thoughts. It seems to be helping me.


Communication with your partner is key. Be honest with each other and take the pressure off. Have fun and laugh. It’s supposed to be a good time, right?

This has helped me in the past and now with more skills I think this may become something I don’t have to worry about anymore. Don’t forget about the physical part of this! Eat right, exercise, see your doctor regularly to make sure your hormones are all balanced!


One thing that helps for me personally is starting in certain positions post foreplay. Sorry for this being vulgar, but My wife will give me head, then we go into doggy style (cause you can hold that position half hard in a way). after a while of intercourse there, I feel hard enough to go into other positions.

It sounds odd, but that has helped me personally and it changes things up for my wife too cause we change positions constantly. It’s different for everyone though.

This is more like a “quick fix” or “place holder” solution for me while I go though this program. Also, communication is so important too.

I highly recommend doing one meditation a day for as couple weeks. After that, even if the anxiety was on top of mind, I felt more under control and didn’t need pills or anything.

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Think this will help I appreciate you gonna cut the :corn: as well

Guess I shouldn’t do it with randoms :joy:

But I regularly excerise and eat (sordve good)

Thank you for the response, just thinking it’s all in my head

Nothing wrong with exploring sex with multiple people my guy, but one of the major benefits of having a single partner for sex is that you can talk, communicate your needs, try things over longer periods of time and really fine tune the experience for each other. I go soft right after foreplay too, but that usually just means foreplay continues until im good to go. I will say though, if you go soft after a bj and still need to get off its her turn homie. Give and take makes the world go round