I can’t ejaculate when having sex with partner the majority of the times. Ive been able to ejaculate once when we’ve had sex. Its now got to the point where we’ve currently taken a break from things as she feels like I’m not attracted to her and don’t desire her, even though I’ve told her that’s not the case. Could do with advice. Ive been masturbating 2 or 3 times a week. I’ve now decided to be abstinent and have been for the last couple of weeks. Has anyone experienced anything like this before and how did they overcome it? Am I doing the right thing in abstinence? I just want a great sex life and things back on track with my partner because she means everything to me.
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I have two words for you: center pleasure. If you both create a context where pleasure is possible, the orgasm will be a part of it. It took a while to get my wife to understand that it’s a problem in my head. It took me describing the feeling that I have of being nervous about failure where it shut off my erection for it to fully sink in for her. Once we got over that hump we have been able to work on it together. It is still in progress, and we’re still experimenting with what works, and understanding each other’s feelings in the moment, but we are working on it together.
Had same issue. Cut all porn and masturbation
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Agree
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I’ve been with my partner for nearly 2 years and have never been able to ejaculate in her and now having problems ejaculating at all with her through masturbation.
Exactly what I did. Was like about 2 weeks of no porn or masturbation. Felt like everything reset for the best
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It’s been like that for me all my life. It has nothing to do with porn or frequency or technique. Mine is connected with childhood trauma PTSD. I can tell you all about why I can only cum when I’m alone, but the causes are so deep in my psyche that I’ve never been able to touch them.
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I’m currently experiencing almost the exact same issues. You should try stop masturbation for 2 weeks to a month. This will reset sensitivity if you have death grip. I have reversed my death grip and now masturbation can be just lightly rubbing my penis.
Refraining from porn has helped me somewhat.
Doing the wax wain exercises, and meditation exercises on the mojo app have also hugely helped.
If you are looking to resensitize I saw a post that putting coconut oil on the tip twice a day helps. I did this also for a little while.
I have seen all the same advice on multiple sources: therapist, mojo app and forums. So trust the process. And if you are comfortable enough, tell your partner what you are doing to work on the issue. My partner says she likes the thought of me working on this myself.
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Yeah about 3 weeks no porn or masturbation and now I’m cumming again from being with a woman. I don’t plan on going back to it