Has anyone here ever had thrush, a rash, and it caused premature ejaculation due to being too sensitive, was happening to me during a sting until i saw the doc and he prescribed canesten, but am still dealing with mental demons if i “am the same as i was before” any opinions of similar cases be much appreciated!
I’m am exactly the same way
i just want to know if my problem is physical or just in my head… when i get into sex with my partner i usually can get a full erection but lose it after 3-5 mins with out cumming. i dont know if i am focusing to much on keeping the erection or keep my length
Im the same way essentially, i will be hard as a rock leading up to sex then as soon as were about to do it i can feel myself losing it… which is why i believe its 99% mental…
I’m in the same place, bud. Luckily my girl loves sex even more than I do, and if I go soft because of the inner monologue, she’s just as happy if I get her off with toys or other body parts. She understands that my PTSD and anxiety can get in the way. Unfortunately, I haven’t yet learned to shut that off. But starting today, I will
I also overthink EVERYTHING almost constantly. And recent stresses in my life have found their way into the bedroom. And it’s causing major issues with my partner. I also don’t think it’s healthy to overthink so much. Especially negative thoughts. Hopefully mojo can help
Another over thinker here. In every aspect of life. Something that’s been helping me a ton is the podcasts in Mojo. Just hearing people going through similar things and seeing the techniques to combat it in real world scenarios with real people has helped me have a way more positive outlook and I can feel my inner critic getting quieter as time goes on. If you haven’t checked the podcasts yet I highly recommend em
No dude that literally sounds like me - I just started this today because I’ve been seeing someone that I really like and see a future with, but my inner critic - which I had never heard before - puts pressure on me to perform and psychs me out like you wouldn’t believe. I’ve never had this issue with other women in the past so I’m wondering if it’s because I haven’t been with a person that I’d commit to in so long. I know it’s psychological and that’s it’s all in my head it just sucks. But just like you I’m in my head even when I think about having sex with her - the inner voice comes back.
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Mental noise is a big deal for me. I call it “spiraling”. I start with an imagined work situation- a discussion - and let it continue as I get angrier and angrier. Due to a stressful and somewhat toxic work environment, these experiences dominated my life.
It was part of a depressive episode and I went to therapy to work through the depression that caused or amplified these thoughts.
Somehow, I think this negativity caused the erectile issues that started a few months ago. I don’t have much self criticism- just these on-going arguments.
During sex, I find it difficult to get out of my head and just relax and enjoy. Then I start to force an erection.
The meditation seems to help keep me calm and will hopefully lead to success in the bedroom.
Sorry to hear about your situation mate. I am the exact same in the sense that I am an extreme overthinker not just when it comes to sex but in daily life as well, to the point where a few weeks ago I’d be mentally exhausted by the end of the day, every day. I say a few weeks ago as I’ve since started the meditations offered through Mojo and other apps. I’d be one of the last people to give meditation a try but since I’ve started I now look forward to doing a session each day and have found it’s really calmed my mind overall. The other techniques/lessons offered here have definitely helped too. All the best on your journey here
I,m a dad of 53 my son 18 is daily having sex with his new girlfriend. I am feeling totally useless as my inner voice is saying why aren’t you performing like him. Nice to read about the inner me and time to ignore him or realise there is hope out there.
Oh man. I might as well have been reading something I wrote. The experience you describe about avoiding sex in order to avoid the self abuse that come when, of course, the performance issues surface, just like your inner voice said they would…. Totally relate. It’s crazy to me because I know logically I can get and maintain an erection to orgasm. If I wake up during the night it’s usually with a raging erection like those of my youth. Even then my inner critic will comment on my erection status. It’s like having in unwelcome third wheel in my relationship that gets between me and my wife. Sick of it!!! I have a wonderful wife and she is so supportive AND the story I tell myself is she feels somehow responsible like it’s something about her that causes me to struggle w performance. That just becomes a whole negative loop in itself. Just new to this app so the shared progress of others is extremely encouraging!!
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Overwhelming, I am like you brother. I think about erections all the time. I wake up sometimes with morning wood or have spontaneous erection during the day, but with my wife, nothing. I crave her body and I ache not being able to have her. I have been doing Mojo for several months, but not helping much. I say ro myself it is in my head and do the exercises, but to no avail. I am at the end if my rope. I think the thing I need to do is completely forget about sex and elections and perhaps my my mind fuck will clear.
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Get out of your head. Thoughts produce feelings so if you are thinking negative you will feel bad and attracting more bad. Shift your focus immediately upon catching yourself and reframe your thoughts to positive. Your body will respond and eventually you will gain control of your thoughts. It is tedious work but it works. I.e anxiety is now anticipation. The good news awareness of the issue is half the battle so congrats! Now go finish it off.
Last month I was on fire! I was not thinking about anything but fucking my wifey and it was amazing. We since then has a disagreement and I immediately started overthinking everything. To the point I didn’t want to be alone with her because what if!! I have started this app in the hope of calming my nerves and anxiety. This has been a reoccurring theme in our 20 plus year marriage. It great to know there is an explanation and somewhat of a community to work through all the noise in my head . Hope to get back to making Whoopi too we than later. Wish me luck
I’m having the same problem , I’m in a two year relationship and the past year I had a lot of financial and work related troubles so sex was becoming and thing when not performing was making me feel
Depressed so I stop trying and it started to affect my relationship, so I’m here trying to fix it , hope u find the answer u r looking for
To be honest my problem, for instance, when i get “active” sexually it gets erected perfectly fine,but the thoughts pile through my head like an avalanche,and id start going soft durring even oral, another problem is although im able to stay erected durring oral and all that say if your lover teases you by stoping any physical activity for a minute or two id go soft in about 30 seconds of no physical contact to my penis,anyone got anything to say to this?
You remind me of me, man!
Most people experience this overly active inner voice. I’ve heard the Buddhist tradition calls it “the monkey mind”.
Meditation can really help.
Trying to “stop” the thoughts feel counterproductive to me. Instead, work on letting them just float past without latching on.
The image of my thoughts as leaves in a relaxing stream is helpful to me.
Many of my thoughts are cognitive distortion at worst, and simple neurons firing at best.
I think we put ourselves at peril when we give our own thoughts too much credence.
I try to let them just float by…
Good luck.
I do this, have you found a way to stop it?
I have felt the same way, and it didn’t take long for a good sexual psychologist to point out: anxiety. Im overthinking because im anxious, even in long-term committed relationships. You may want to explore this too! The other item in my current relationship is…sex Isn’t ‘just’ intercourse. It’s everything, kissing cuddling all the stuff!