I get hard on my own, I get hard with my girl, I can climax, but sometimes I’m harder than other times and as a virgin in a new relationship as a 21 year old male. I can’t perform for sex, everything else I’m fine but how do I know it’s not something wrong with my body? This is just really frustrating as someone who’s been wanting this moment for such a long time.
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Hey there, when in doubt it’s always a good idea to chat with a urologist they can definitively tell you if the root cause is physical.
However the fact that you said “everything else I’m fine” does suggest that your body is working as expected and it’s more the mental aspect that’s affecting you.
For me personally I tend to feel lost when I am not in control, I’d recommend trying positions on your own and visualizing being with your girl when masturbating. When it comes down to the doing the deed. Kissing and embracing your partner can help you feel comfortable and safe. Try to tune in to the physical sensations and focus on the moment rather than your expectations or the climax. Hope this helps