I have no issue staying hard during oral sex but when it comes to penetration, my dick becomes limp pretty quickly. Never used to be a problem but now it happens every time I try and penetrate my girlfriend. Any one else have the same issue? It’s killing me!
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Similar problem in a way. I get hard watching porn. No ED problems at all. But when with my wife I need a pill. And even then I go limp quickly and can’t finish. I think it’s all in my head. We are almost 50. 4 kids later etc. I know what she will and won’t do. Porn is that fantasy. She’s a total slut. Can’t get enough does it all. Reality is opposite. I feel for you. That’s why I’m here. Trying to kick the porn habit and relearn how to get out of my head and really enjoy my wife again
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Same as all above really, married for nearly 18yrs and always had a great sex life. Always got hard and ready as soon as I was in the mood but these days I’m worried about getting it up at all.
I get hard from head but not as quickly as I used to which makes me worry, then she worries, and then it all falls apart pretty quickly!
I’ve been staying away from porn lately to try and break the habit of being turned on when I’m alone to see if that will get me back to the right place in my own mind
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Holy cow initial silver, I thought I had posted something I forgot about. Having the same issue as well. Only 39 and no kids. Im sure porn has destroyed my mind with what I should be expecting in the bedroom.
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Have you seen any initial improvement at all?
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Its very early days but I’d say yes, there has been some improvement. We’ve been trying to be a bit more spontaneous as well, but it’s tricky as she doesn’t want for me to feel under any pressure
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I’ve been avoiding porn as it’s definitely had this effect on me and what I expect. If it’s not a full on porn scene I don’t seem to react! Going back to basic and being spontaneous seems to be working slowly
Here’s what I think is the problem with porn. It’s not just that it’s fantasy. It’s that it’s exclusively visual (and a bit aural, the sounds etc). So we condition our brains to respond to those visual cues, and eventually ONLY to those. But real sex is 90% tactile - it’s about touch. I found it really, really helped to try and turn off my visual mind entirely and just focus on the sensations, the nerves. It doesn’t mean quitting porn necessarily - it just means focusing more on sex as the real physical experience. Get out of the visual; hey, try blindfolds. It’s not just a kink, it might actually help you feel more.
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Blindfolds.
I’m very self conscious of my body. Lil heavy, moobs, and a little dick. (Trifecta!!) I do better for sure with the lights out, but I wonder if I blindfolded her, then I could see all her beauty and watch her facial expressions as she enjoys what’s going on….
I also notice that when she’s got her eyes closed, I feel more at ease. (That JUST registered I. My brain….)