Finding it hard to get it up sometimes

I’ve been with my my girlfriend for a month and now and we have great sex with each other and she enjoys it every time but sometimes when it comes down to it I just can’t get hard when we start kissing and she grinds against me I feel so turned on and just cannot get hard but but other times I’m hard all the time I don’t know why this is it’s almost like it’s got a kind of its own and it’s starting to become a problem because she says it makes her feel insecure when I can’t get hard and I don’t know what to tell her because she thinks I’m not attracted to her and it’s causing quite the problem and I’m worried that it could be a cause that the relationship doesn’t work


Tell her what you just wrote down. Reassure her by showing you care, take her somewhere nice, make her a good meal, fill her a warm bubble bath over candles and sea salt, whatever you know she likes.
You got this bro.

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I have bro but she gets really hurt when I go soft she says it makes her feel horrible and she seems to think she’s not attractive I always reassure her and tell her she looks good all the time but when that happens it all goes out the window and she doesn’t believe what I say because i still go soft but it’s not like I can’t get it up I do and we have great sex and we both finish and it’s amazing but I can’t get hard all the time and when I don’t it’s a big deal

It’s a very vulnerable conversation, but you have to really tell her it’s not her fault. I had the same thing, I love my girlfriend, I find her super hot, but she thinks I’m not getting good erections because she gained a few pounds lately. I told her that wasn’t the case, that I’ve struggled with erection issues before, and that I’m working on that. She still thinks she’s a little to blame, despite my assurances, so I’m really working on myself. We cannot control what the other person thinks/believe, so focus on you, your pleasure, your body, and hopefully things will work out most of the time.


Ever try to force yourself to go to sleep? Like you know you need to get up early, so you HAVE to go to sleep NOW. And of course it doesn’t work at all, because that’s the opposite of how sleep works.

It’s the same way with erections. If you feel like you HAVE to get hard, it ain’t happening. If you can take the focus off of getting hard and focus on enjoying the moment, you will actually find it easier to get hard. It takes some practice, but that’s exactly what the exercises in the app are for.


I feel that exactly if I every try and force my self it’ll never happen I’m going to see her tomorrow I’m not going to plan to sleep with her and try not to get any thoughts in my head but if it happens it happens just going in with a clear mind and stay calm I’ll say how it goes after