Getting Hard is a Chore Now

Me and my girl have been together for almost 5 years. Early on, it was sex a lot and even as time went on, we had less but erection was never an issue. Now within the past 8 months, it’s been 3 times I couldn’t get it up. She says it’s okay but I feel like shit. I know she isn’t going to leave but as a man my confidence is low. Since then, there are times where I’m hard and it’s fine. But I’m always worrying if it’ll stay up or get up at all. When I masturbate, no issues at all. And if we start sex with her giving me a blowjob, we are fine. It’s like I need that stimulation first. We had sex a few days ago, no oral. I got it up but it started going flaccid so I panicked and came fast, then went down on her for the longest I’ve ever done. I don’t think she noticed but I felt like shit after.


In longer term relationships keeping the intimate side of things ‘going’ can be problematic. The most important part will be communication. If you can have a chat or several chats about what is important - what you like and what is pleasurable. How often can you manage to find time? Negotiate what will work for you both. Being together for 5 years shows that a lot of your relationship works ,it might just take a bit of time to work out what you both need from the intimate side of things at this stage. Mojo will help you get your confidence back with your erections and again talking this over with your partner will help. Good luck!