When I met my partner on Grindr, we would hook up and have a lot of sex. I had no problem getting an erection and topping him. It was easy, and we would do it multiple times a day.
We are now in a relationship of about a year, and I have trouble staying erect enough to top him. So I end up bottoming (which he introduced me too and I enjoy).
I suspect the difference is that I care about him, and don’t want to disappoint him during sex now (as opposed to just having fun originally).
How do I get back to how sex was originally where it was so easy?
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I don’t have an answer for you, but I’ve been in the same position. Trying to figure it out myself. Caused some friction between me and my ex. Unfortunately he was not mature enough to talk about it when I tried to bring it up. I think having conversations about it would be helpful, and setting expectations that you just have time to have fun naked with no expectations of penetration- then if you’re in the mood and feeling try it in the moment. I know that’s tough with prepping, but for me if I went into it thinking I was going to top, I’d be too worried about disappointing him to get hard.