I first experienced ED during a drunken one night stand in my mid 20s. It knocked my confidence for a bit but I soon recovered and entered into a long term relationship with someone a few weeks later. That lasted until my early 30s when I became single again. We didn’t have a lot of sex towards the end but I performed fine.
I was single for 5 years but dated a lot. I was completely dependent on Viagra during that time, but I performed well on a low dose and had a decent sex drive.
I’ve been in a new serious relationship for 6 months now and I love and desire her, but my ED has gotten worse. The Viagra no longer works and I’m scared of being around her and especially of having sex. One rare occasions I’m actually able to get hard even without Viagra - usually just for a short while but sometimes enough to have sex and finish. Until recently I was a 5-8 times a week man, but since the ED got worse with my gf my libido has completed died and I don’t want to spend any time with my gf. This of course makes things worse as a self-purpetuating cycle. I don’t even masterbate and struggle to get hard for that. If I do I feel guilty that it isn’t for my gf and that if I masterbate it’ll kill my sex drive.
I’m stuck in a loop which I’m struggling to get out of and it’s making me feel anxious and depressed. I think about not being able to get hard all the time. I used to be a stallion in my 20s and now I’m useless and I’m still a few years from 40!
I’m trying not to get stuck in a pity party cause I think it’ll make me worse. I know it’s all anxiety and anxiety makes people believe and think crazy things. I’m hoping some encouragement and tips will help. Thanks.