Do you ever get anxious during sex? How does it affect you? (Part 2)

I do when I start to lose my erection or if I feel I’m not performing like I should

Yea during foreplay my heart starts to race

I have had this problem since 20s, he goes back to sleep when I need him

Used to masturbate a lot to porn, slowed down for a while then the last time I went to have intercourse realised I no longer get 100% hard. Get about 80-90% there but it’s weaker than it used to be. Don’t know if this is something I can fix or what. Had had me stressed ever since


I recently have been unable to maintain an erection when I go down on my girlfriend and get so frustrated / in my head that my penis is unable to get hard again after. I worry so deeply about ensuring I can bring her all the sexual gratification she deserves, but now struggle to think of something other than maintaining an erection (which inevitably causes me to lose it) while we are intimate.

Yes, i’m was anxious and i can’t go on.

Yes I get anxious during sex. It usually makes me feel numb and makes it difficult to connect with my partners.

Whenever me and my wife want to have sex (me slightly more than her normally but during ovulation she wants it all the time), we typically start out with me on my back and her either giving me head or snuggling up beside me while we both stroke it together. It’s really nice and I very often become hard decently quickly but then we keep going and going and it takes SOOO long for me to cum! It’ll take between 30min to an hour sometimes! There are rare occasions when I’m REALLY horny and then it lasts like, 10ish minutes, but for the most part it’s a long process. Because of that my penis gets sore/bruised occasionally and that makes it even harder to come! So, by the time I finally get there I am completely worn out and struggle to move very well.

Because it takes so long, my wife and I have typically just had me in the exact same position every time I want to cum (I’ve never cum in any position other than lying flat on my back with my head propped up and my legs fully extended and flexed to the max). All this to say that I have kinda just relegated myself to the fact that I will never cum any other way and that means that whenever we’re want to spice it up and change positions I instantly get flaccid. I can get her to cum like 30 times in one session but typically I don’t cuz then I won’t be able to cum. There have been times where I’ve been able to stay hard and penetrate her from behind standing at the side of the bed but it only lasts so long and I definitely have not been able to come in that position.

Also, I don’t know if this relates to the topic at all but I can’t really feel anything inside my wife’s vagina with my penis. In fact, my penis is not that sensitive. We’ve looked up how to re-sensitize your penis and I’ve been doing all the things and I’m not overweight and I work out my prostate muscles and everything but nothing seems to work or even make a little difference.

Yes, I’m newly single after being in a relationship for 11 years and have since had two sexual encounters. One of which I couldn’t get hard and the second, I could but struggled to sustain it.

No. It happens before during foreplay. I’ll get 50-75% erect then the anxiety kicks in.

I get too nervous and then I can’t get it up

Yes. My first experience didn’t go as planned age 17. It’s been a constant problem ever since (22 years) overthinking, worry and anxious at every encounter. Seems to be getting worse to the point we can’t have inter course right now. Partner is understanding but just says she doesn’t mind but I know deep down she does and thinks it’s because I don’t find her attractive, which could not be further from truth. She is an absolute rocket :rocket:

Yes I do. It makes me soft and I get frustrated or ashamed.

Absolutely I do, my partner hits all the marks of what I think is sexy and despite getting hard when they came home and waking up from a nap. In the time between when they showered off and were ready I couldn’t perform. It’s embarrassing and beyond frustrating. Additionally I don’t want them to think that my mind is somewhere else, and that it’s anything to do with them. And when I have those thoughts in the middle of us being intimate it’s just downhill from there because it turns into a performance anxiety downward spiral of me worried that they think it’s on them when I’m having trouble getting hard, which then in turn adds more anxiety and makes me feel worse about myself and wanting desperately for my dick to perform and add more stress onto myself which makes it just impossible to get out of

Yes and then I can’t keep an erection, I also struggle with confidence when this happens

I do, since past experiences (even with meds) my anxiety makes my erection weak and not ready for sex. Which starts a spiral

Yes, I think that I have to have my pennis up, that i have to be able to maintain it up. Some times it wouldnt get up, and the times that i could do it, I couldnt enjoy 100% because i get stuck on my thoughts instead of focusing on the real sex

Yes, causes me to lose the erection. I can feel my body get warm all over sometimes little or no reason and it is all I can focus on

I often feel anxious, like I’m about to step out on stage with a lot of expectations on my shoulders.