I’ve been dealing with PE for about two years now. I began feeling inadequate in life after experiencing combat and having difficulty processing those experiences. When i first met my wife, sex was great, and we both expressed interest in swinging and less common practices that i had always been curious about. As we spent more time together and opened up to each other more I started hearing that voice saying I wasn’t good enough. It grew to the point where I was timing myself to compare to other people. I became to afraid to actually swap partners because I thought she would realize she could do better. It put a lot of strain on our relationship and I almost cuased a breakup because of my inability to process emotions well.
Eventually I did get therapy for the PTS, but sexually I’ve still been hurting. I did work up the courage to do a full swap and it was amazing and very freeing, soke of the most enjoyable sex ive had with my wife or ever. Even after that, though, I still hear that voice saying I’m not good enough, especially when it’s just the two of us. I feel like when I perform it’s short lived and disappointing.
We are trying polyamory now, and it’s very freeing, but I still have this irrational fear that I’ll be disappointing to any woman I’m with. I get in my head and feel climax approaching and panic while trying to hold it off