Cannot get an erection to have sex feeling hopeless

Over the past year I have tried to have sex with a number of girl but on every occasion I have not been able to get it up, it is worth noting that every time I have tried to do it I have had quite a bit of alcohol to drink that night so I don’t know if that has contributed to my issues. But after the first time I felt very ashamed and I ended up not trying with that same girl again. Recently I have met a new girl and again when we tried to get serious I could not get hard, I know that I was thinking about it and it got to the point that I just accepted my fate.

After that experience I decided to download this app which I was using for a little while on and off, trying to remember some of the talking points and techniques to stay relaxed, I ended up trying again with the same girl and again I could not get hard. I tried to use the techniques but I was still rather anxious and trying to focus on the moment clearly did not help the situation any. I now feel like it’s hopeless and I am worried because I really like this girl and she was so amazing and understanding about the situation thus far and was very relaxed about the situation and was trying to help me. But I fear that she will only be understanding about it for so long and I don’t want to lose her but I feel like it’s hopeless cause if it’s not worked so far when will it work

If anyone’s had any similar experiences or any advice on the situation id appreciate it

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Hey man, thanks for sharing your experience. Alcohol can inhibit erections. I used to use alcohol to increase my confidence and decrease nerves but also found it meant I couldn’t get an erection, no matter how horny I was beforehand. One glass of alcohol should steady the nerves without affecting your dick too much. Can you get hard when alone? Watching porn or masturbating for example?

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Thanks for the reply man, yeah I’m fine getting hard when I’m by myself although I have never tried it after drinking tbh so I haven’t managed to conclude if that is the issue. But I appreciate your insight that alcohol could be playing a part in this issue

I’ve had the same issues….sex with a new partner. I’m horny af leading up to bedroom time…but as soon as my mind knows that sex is about to happen, I lose all feeling…

A trick I found that helps…sex in the shower. Not sure what it is, but start off kissing and pulling each other close seems to gain an erection. Maybe it’s an extra sensory feeling or something?

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Have the issues you’ve faced been consistent or does it only happen on some occasions. And I appreciate the shower tip I’ll introduce that