So I’ve been suffering from performance anxiety for around 7 months now and I’ve been on and off this app for those 7 months but only really been taking it seriously the month or 2. I have an issue with receiving head. I had a few instances 7 months ago where I went soft during head because of a few things that happened that were unrelated to sex and since then I’ve been so in my head and going soft during blowjobs. Having sex is fine mostly, I sometimes get a little anxiety about it but I can manage it. Otherwise I really struggle with blowjobs. I’m meditating doing the wax and wane sensate and soft penis pleasuring. Will that help in the long run and do you have anymore tips, would be gratefully appreciated 
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You might just be more in your head when you are not the one that is in control. I have the same problem and think i need to do sensate focus to be less in my head.
Could also be you are naturally more dominant or you just need to try to let go and enjoy the sensations. Or your partner needs to do more variety or blow you in different position. Like you putting it in her mouth while she’s laying down or if she kneels before you.
Best of luck.
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Yeah I haven’t really done sensate focus but only just getting into it now. I think your right