My wife thinks the issue is her and it destroys self-confidence. She hates having the conversation. I’m usually OK in the bedroom. It’s only happened a few times and 22 years but now I’ve got a complex. I know it’s me and I need to get over it.
I feel comfortable because at some point it will surface. I recently started dating someone and raised the issue of sexual intimacy and ED, he was receptive and we’re talking through it.
I feel nervous and feel like a failure
I talked to my girlfriend about it the other day and felt so much better. It helped me to get out of my head and put it out in the open.
I feel like it really depends on the pace & person.
If you’re hot & heavy with someone early on and you bring up the potential psychologic ed it can plant a seed of doubt in both of you.
Whereas addressing it point blank in the moment with confidence and care can be well received.
Something like “hey I’m little nervous right now, (you could tell them in part cause you really like them) I’m enjoying myself, what else can I do to please you.”
After my partner starts really enjoying themself I usually come around.
If it’s a slow building relationship I can see where it may be advantageous to bring it up.
I’ve heard from friends & partners it’s more common than you may think. How you react to it will set the tone.
I want to begin trying this. I feel deep down this would take so much pressure out of The situation and allow me to stay in the moment and out of my head
This is something I have always struggled with. To the point my relationship has almost ended. I need to be braver, less scared and ashamed, and use the I statements more. I’m at the point of what’s the worst that can happen
I do discuss those when I feel like I need to. But need to get a bit more encouragement from my partner
I think it’s important to let my partner know what’s happening and why. She knows I’m using mojo to try and overcome some things and using the app has helped me to understand what my problem is and helped me to be able to let her know. Which I hope has helped to alleviate some of her worries that it’s something she’s done or that I no longer find her attractive.
I feel so much shame discussing this. I hope that using ‘I’ statements and talling about this more helps with my confidence and ability to relax.
Not comfortable at all
More comfortable now than ever
It’s seemig more and more like there is very literally on this app. I keep getting the same videos repeated again and again. It’d fine with activities like breathing and kegles. Bit not repeated videos.
Well a bit more open to the idea. I need to heal old wounds before stepping out again.
Very comfortable. It always helps.
I tried this with my last partner. I think me talking about anxieties around coming quickly made her develop a preoccupation. She had her own issues with struggling to orgasm with a partner. I think, despite best of intentions, it turned sex into a challenge, puzzle or obstacle to be solved, rather than an experience to enjoy. It potentially requires better communication on my part, going forward.
I’m blessed to have started a relationship with someone who sees and appreciates all the parts of me and isn’t stressed or preoccupied by whether I’m able to get an erection in a given moment or day.
Better to discuss than not. My wife is supportive so far but I could we could also talk more about our needs.
I have had that conversation, and it took the pressure off.
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