When I was young I had an animalistic relationship with sex — the opposite of cerebral. For the last few years, performance anxiety (specifically around getting and staying hard) has been corrosive; I’m way more in my head than I used to be. So sex feels like a mental exercise now. Often I have to fantasize about something else to cum. I still love sex, am highly sexual, and conceptually understand that boners aren’t everything. But my inner critic still pipes up.
I’m hoping to take all the thinking and worry out of sex and recover that raw, primal relationship to it.