Have always had some performance anxiety related ED but have been with my wife for 7 years and apart from the odd occasion I’ve always enjoyed the best sex life with her. The last 6 months the relationship broke down and during this time the ED got worse and added fuel to the fire. In the last two months we’ve really worked on our relationship and feel like we’re back but the ED just isn’t going away. Have been using the mojo app when I can but stresses of kids work etc feels like I could do more. In a cycle now of non performance and anxiety and got to the point now I just can’t relax and enjoy sex again. My partner is really understanding and we talk it through but I know she’s as frustrated as me. Thought maybe writing it down might help but starting to feel desperate and just want this to end and have my life back.
The only thing I can add to this is that when I fully let my partner into this, it made it much easier. She has had full access to my Mojo program and progress, and some of the exercises we do together.
It has reduced the stress and expectation by a significant amount by allowing her to be part of the solution, rather than a bystander waiting for me to get better.
Other than that, for your kids, work etc; ask for help. You don’t need to do this alone, nor do you need to divulge everything. Ask someone to babysit (or hire one from time to time), if you have time to take off then take it. Be sure to practice some meditation to reduce your stress (I found headspace to be particularly good).
I wish you all the best my friend, you’ll get there just take a breath and be patient with yourself!