Masturbation with a strong grip

Hey folks, I’m new to mojo and just starting on my journey to recovery.
I’m here because I have issues maintaining an erection during intercourse. I’m able to stay erect and cum with my partner if it’s oral or other foreplay, as well as in masturbation.
Among other negative beliefs I hold, the biggest one I have is that I need a certain amount of friction and speed to be able to stay erect and cum. You might have seen guys refer to this on the Internet as death grip.
With said death grip, usually when I masturbate it also doesn’t take me very long to finish. So I feel my brain is conditioned to instant gratification, which isn’t the case during intercourse where the grip/friction/speed don’t match my/partner’s hands.

What advice do you have for me to help retrain my mind and body to enjoy stimulation through intercourse?


How has your Mojo journey been mate? I have had similar experiences with needing more friction or having to go harder. The best thing that worked for me was to hold off masturbating for a few days and reconnect with my body through touch. Create new pathways for pleasure and know that you don’t have to cum to experience pleasure. The guided masturbation exercises really help to get out of your usual way of doing things and recreate what you would be experiencing with a partner. Hopefully you have been going through each phase at a time and are seeing the benefits. Cheers

Thanks for the reply, I really appreciate it! I gave myself a break from masturbation for about 3 weeks, to give myself distance from the specific way I’ve trained myself to receive pleasure. The retraining myself to lighter touch part is where I haven’t made progress yet so far. Basically my brain is still looking for that death grip. But I’m hopeful that in time it will get fixed, and posts from people like you only increase that hope!

I had the same experience. I got a fleshlight now for when I masturbate and I think that’s helping me. I practice imitating sex with my partner to re-sensitize my penis.