For many years now, I’ve always had problems with my confidence because of my size, atleast when it’s on soft. I use to always get hard immediately when a girl touch me, hug me, kiss me, all that good stuff. From like 12-17. Idk what to anymore because now i always have a problem with my size on soft, always compared my self, always hated my self, i never realized how much it affected me till i first had sex i couldn’t keep up, i couldn’t stay hard for some reason. Then I look up stuff and tells me about psychological Ed and im only 23 years old. I don’t want to feel like it’s something physical, cuz there is times I stay hard all night and then times where I can’t. And then I depend on pills or gummies and sometimes they work because i trust in them, and then sometimes it don’t and it comes to the point I rely on them so much. I have a girl I been with for over a year now. And she is still here with me; the fact she had told me truth I didn’t want to hear but still is here because she cares about me and is only here for me and me only and likes me and my size and says it’s big and all that but at the same time it’s just like I can’t believe in my self cuz I do believe her it’s not her, and in the beginning she thought I wasn’t attracted and she is like way too good to me and she is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Her sex drive is so high and I really want to match hers. I just want to stay rigid hard every time on demand and even when there is times I can’t. I just would want to laugh it off and know there is another time and it’s only like once every like idk 3 months or something to where like it’s not always an issue. I just want to please her cuz she says I really am good at sex like really good I jus need to stay hard every times there is times where it’s good sex and then it’s times where I can’t stay hard. and I stay in my head but then when I’m trying not to be in my head it still don’t work and that’s why I feel Is it also physical. It’s so much more to it but it will be a long long essay of a paragraph. I’m really looking for answers I need help. I wish I figured this out way long before I got with my girl and I always do negative to my self and hate my self. I need help I need answers I need to reverse my mental and body health. I want a high sex drive, no anxiety, no heart beating super fast hoping I can stay up long enough. It says to focus on the pleasure and I really do but then I still have that feeling in my head and body also even when I’m trying to focus on the sex and be in my body. I just want to have a good sex life and provide the best sex without worrying about staying hard and having a healthy relationship with my partner. I want to have a high sex drive, high libido, hard on demand, stop worrying. I need help. Anyone please! What to do? How to I stay out of my head, how to I keep up, how to I make my self more confidence. I’m tired of pills, I’m tired of wasting money, I want to love my self 100% again. 
I think my friend the answers to your issues are right there in your paragraph - you have a great girlfriend, she loves sex with you, you have a good size, you’re good at sex! But with this problem we ruminate over the bad things when we should go over and over in our heads the successes and you’ve got many above. Back yourself and don’t beat yourself up or set high expectations- just enjoy and don’t worry if you sometimes get anxious it’s no big deal, enjoy it and pleasure her some other way, then you’ll forget about the stress side eventually and just get better and enjoy. You’re young and have a great partner so you’ll totally get past all this. GOOD LUCK!!
Thing is, tried other forms of it and it works right; but soon I got to penetrate it goes down quick. Days where’s it’s not and days where it is. Been having more bad than good lately. Over a year now. I just want it everyday and I do get in my moods alot it jus seems like my body won’t allow me. How do I stop that negative thoughts how do I stop that racing in my heart even when I’m not trying to be anxious ? Cuz I’m not afraid of sex, I’ve been more comfortable with my size on soft cuz it’s not big on soft but it’s big on hard okay. Yeh I use to think bout my size alot and yeah I still do but I wanna be hard all the time all night without problems. Even when I’m semi hard, she don’t feel it and that’s embarrassing. It’s got to the point where she gets upset and I don’t blame her but now it’s like an expectation and pressure to try to please her when I jus wanna have my body feel so good and to jus not have these feelings and anxiety running thru my body. I just wanna get hard and stay hard all the time with no relies on pills or gummies. Idk how to stay out of my head and in the body, ive also watched porn for many years since I was a child like child child. I think that also ruined it but I know it’s not real intimate sex it’s just a job and it’s fake sex if that makes sense. I just want to be intimate and have a high sex drive and increase in my libido, mood, energy, confidence.