I dont know what wrong with me and i need your opinion and help

🍆 Erection issues
1

So I started out when i was like 14 masturbating, to porn, pictures and even imagination it was never the same.

I never saw a problem with my erection even though i dont really remember me having morning wood maybe because i cant remember because its been so long since i had one.

At 18 i went with my first girl, a foreigner which i met at a club, she gave me blowjob and i wasnt really thinking much but i noticed that I wasnt really hard, it was like going and coming (a semi). And she asked me “are you hard?” after that i never really though of it but it may have been stuck in the back of my head.

That same year i was going to lose my virginity and that same day i remember i was touching myself and worrying about my erection and couldnt get hard alone, only by watching porn. When it came to it i couldnt get hard, not even a semi. This day haunted me badly and i did weeks thinking about it. But masturbation didnt really change i was still the same.

But after that i did around a year (where i didnt go with anyone) where i was always checking that my erection is good, like moving it back to see that its hard rock. And it was, sometimes even though i needed constant stimulation.

Then i had another opportunity where i met this foreigner and we were chatting on snapchat and there i was noticing that my erection wasnt being maintained when we were doing sex talk on the phone.

When i met her it went well even though not a consistent erection, i managed to ejaculate and had a pretty good erection (not rock hard)

But its like a constant memory of me and masturbating that i never really was satisfied with my erection. And thats why i doubted that it was mental.

Now im noticing that its always been a problem in my head especially now that i have a girlfriend. Im constantly thinking about my erection and why im not like others. Im trying to accept my emotions but i find it really hard as ive never had a really good experience in sex or alone ever since that day. Even my morning wood is gone. It cant be that i have low testosterone because i wouldnt be able to get hard at all no?

Im just stuck in this constant loop which i dont know how to get out of, even with you advice and all the youtube videos i watch. Not even viagra worked on me. Im sure this will pass and i just need one good experience but that day doesnt feel like its coming. Im always thinking about it and my butt is always clenched and never relaxed hoping for an erection to spontaneously come because its been that long.

My girlfriend is happy with me either way but im just worried that i can never have sex and have kids like i want to. Its a constant fear that i either have something wrong with me physically (which is impossible cause i took a pill and didnt work) or emotional blockage.

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That sounds really rough mate, I can’t believe that we’re all on here having these psychological ED issues when sex is supposed to be the most natural thing in the world - it’s meant to perpetuate the human race. Well you’re not alone, and I don’t think there’s anything physically wrong with your penis (just like mine), there’s some psychosomatic thing causing this block that we all need to figure out - to crack. Let’s do this, get over it then advise other men. We can do this - it’s just an erection.

Sounds like you have a really awesome girlfriend btw. She likes you for you

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made me tear up man, I love her and I just don’t want to lose her because of this. Thanks for replying, means the world to me that I’m not alone

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Firstly nothing is wrong with you. You are like a lot of men. Use the app, learn to relax, talk to what sounds like an amazing partner about it, leave nothing out. Hopefully with some of the exercises and a more chilled approach things will get better. As for the porn etc, sounds like a mental thing. Work on getting out your head. Also, those pills can’t overcome a mental block, you still need to be mentally in the right place, they only help with the physical, however I found in the past, they can help you gain confidence which in tern helps the mental side. Good luck

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Porn induced erectile dysfunction. Porn is a super stimulant. Google it. Quit spanking it to porn.

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BRO this is me exactly I really love how open and honest everyone is on this app really brings community together I know I’m not damaged because I can still get hard but after my bad experiences with my partner and whenever I see my girlfriend no matter how hot I think she is and how sexy her nude body looks I just can’t seem to relax enough like how I do when I’m watching porn masturbating alone. It really is a vicious cycle of self doubt and anxiety and porn is no better no matter if it’s amateur stuff or an actual scene seeing how solid those guys are railing the girls just makes me question my own abilities. When I’m able to relax and everything comes together I have good sex with my girlfriend but it happens too infrequently for me to feel good about it I just want to rewire my Brain

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You are not alone and you’re in the right place to sort out your issue -which is all in your head btw.
We’re all here for pretty much the same reason as being in your own head and having constant anxiety about your erection is the main cause of your issues, Remember what you focus on becomes your reality so constant fear of not getting hard just translates into you not getting hard.
This app has helped me realise that I need to let go of my inner critic as the negativity just undermines me and who I want to be. I need to learn to deal with stress (as I mainly create it in my head) by using breathing and meditation to relax more, especially before and during sex.
I need to have faith in my body and penis as it knows what to do If I just provide it with the right circumstances be eliminating the -ve self talk and just trusting and loving all of me and to enjoy the connection and sensations of the moment.
I’ve finally talked to my wife about my issues and told her I’m doing this app and she’s been really supportive. That’s been a weight off my shoulders as I used to try to hide my erection worries from her by taking the blue pills and watching porn to turn me on before sex . That helped for a while but didn’t work all the time and wasn’t the real solution. Or I’d just avoid sex altogether and ignore any sexual hints from my wife. This obviously didn’t make her feel loved and didn’t make me feel good either.
This app has definitely changed my whole outlook and I’m much more positive about the future even though I’ve got more work to do here.
I had thoughts that something was wrong with my penis and that I may never be able to have great sex again but I know that’s all bullshit now.
You’ll get there with patience. Just be kind to your self by taking the pressure off and loosing the guilt and shame while doing the exercises here and believe you can get rock hard during sex and have a great time.

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This is how I am. Sometimes I can have perfect sex with my girlfriend. But recently I’ve been stuck in a cycle where I lose my erection when we start to touch each other

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:100:agree.
I quit 90%. I’m down to maybe 1x per week. Last night I listened to a couple of the audio stories here rather than video. I imagined my gf was the narrator….
:sunglasses:

I still think I’m too used to my own grip.