Last week I had sex for the first time in 2 years, after years of failing to get hard with other girls, them leaving me, or ghosting me the next day. I’m always able to get semi hard or hard before hand during foreplay but the minute I go to put it in, all these thoughts rush to my head telling me I won’t stay hard. I get distracted, I lose the moment and finally lose my erection which then turns me off completely, turns the girl off completely and its hard for me to get another erection after that because I’m just not interested anymore. Also I wouldn’t say I’m a horny guy and I rarely get morning wood, I go through periods in my life where I’m more horny then ever, jerking off everyday, morning wood everyday and then have periods where I don’t jerk off for weeks or months at a time, rarely get morning wood, but what I found that helped me have sex last week was being honest and telling the girl what’s happening, I had already tried to have sex with her 2 times before and she was completely understanding of the situation even helping me at times. What she did, is she told me to close my eyes, think of something, while she jerked me off, she kept saying to keep my eyes close and finally she just got on top of me and put it in for me. It was a smooth transition from jerking off to penetration. The whole time I had my eyes closed and was just making sure I stayed in the moment and didn’t let my thoughts get to me, I had times as she was riding me where I had a mini panic attack where I thought I would go soft but I just focused on the feeling of what it feels like inside of her and everything went back to normal. This made me realized that it’s all mental and this still hasn’t solved my problems completely as I failed last night because I let my thoughts get to me. Was fully hard, went to slip it in and boom it was gone, but this is good progress, although I’ve only been on Mojo for 4 days, the breathing exercises and learning to stay in the moment is what is making me realized that their is hope and it really is just in your head. I was able to stay in the moment that night and because of that I stayed hard and had sex. You need to realized that it’s ok not to be able to preform and that some people just need to get comfortable with a person before they can do anything. Nobody is perfect, I’m still working on myself and trying to lose that anxiety of staying hard but what has helped me is finding someone who is understanding and knowing what you like, from past experience and present I’ve realized that I need stimulation on my dick to stay hard and stay in the moment. When you have stimulation down there, either from handjob or oral it’s easier to focus on the feeling, staying in the moment and if ever you lose your focus its easier to just think of the feeling and snapback into it. Don’t be scared to tell your partner what you want. Feel free to add anything you want to this in the comments!
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Wow very good post I definitely needed to read this I’m in the boat as well hopefully I can come to this soon it’s been driving me nuts
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