Grower not a shower

This is something I’ve never told anyone but I think I know what one of my barriers is. I’m a tall guy and I think the expectation is for me to be really hung. However when I’m soft I think my penis is on the small side but when hard it is average and pretty girthy and does the job. I worry that when they see my soft penis they will be dissapointed and that then makes me anxious and creates a vicious cycle where I then can’t get hard. :persevere: I just wondered if anyone can relate and if so what they do to help?.


Hey, I’m a gay guy. I just want to let you know that a grower is always hotter than a shower.

Imagine if you get a huge gift box, and inside is something not very valuable. Now imagine receiving a small box, but inside is a Rolex.

When a penis keeps growing, and then more, and even more, that’s what makes me super excited. When you don’t expect much but then you get a girthy nice dick, that is a very pleasant surprise. Believe me you’re lucky.


Agreed ^^^^

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I just finished the Soft Penis Pleasure step and this is where it clicked for me as well. I really don’t like my soft penis, because the difference from when it’s hard is so huge. Despite getting positive reactions to the ‘growing process’, I still start out anxious.

I suppose my advice would be to invest less time in your partner’s possible reactions (like different-orange-newt mentioned: They’re probably going to love it anyway) - and focus on you being more at ease with your soft penis. That’s what I’m working on right now!


Thanks guys, that’s really reassuring. I need to try and get out of my head and in to my body to enjoy the feelings.

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Thanks mate, I’m also gay so to hear you say that is reassuring. It feels like the gay world is obsessed by big cocks and it creates alot of pressure if you not big when it’s flaccid.

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Think this held me back too. I had an undescended testicle as a kid that never fully grew so I always hated my balls and my dick is pretty small when soft. It’s average hard and big enough but I hated for anyone to see it soft


I feel exactly the same way as you! Trying to accept and love my penis as it is and I know guys will not care about it.