I’ve been dating a girl for a little over 3 weeks now. 25 years old male. We have the most amazing connection. I’ve never been in a real long term relationship. My previous times having sex were just one night stands, and friends with benefits. I’m so attracted to this girl in all ways. We are both really into each other and see ourselves long term. We are both looking for a long term relationship. We’ve hung out multiple times at each other’s places. Cuddling and other foreplay as well as giving each other oral. Last night while I was putting on a condom, I lost my erection right before we started having sex. I felt so embarrassed and sad. I’ve never experienced ED before. She was very understanding and didn’t want me to worry about it. I’ve never felt feelings this strong for a girl so I think that has a lot to do with my overthinking, and inability to sustain an erection. Has anyone else experienced this or something similar? Any tips or advice is much appreciated. Thank you!
I understand you completely! It’s happening to me as well, I know for a fact that it is 100% mentally. Happy to hear that she was understanding that will certainly make you feel in a safe space but I can understand the embarrassment feeling of not being able to perform. Society doesn’t speak on these issues and it’s always expected of men to walk with our dicks hard all day. One thing that has helped me is taking tadalafil cause it makes me feel confident that when I’m on it it won’t happen. I downloaded the app cause I certainly don’t want to be taking a pill for the rest of my life. Keep me posted on your progress.
I’ve definitely noticed a common theme on here, that often guys will experience problems only with girls they really like. To me this is 100% a confidence thing, because you actually care about this girl you get so in your own head. The stakes are now high because you like this girl and don’t want to mess it up. I think if you try to really stay in the moment and keep in your mind that, she likes you and is choosing to be with you, that can really help, focus on the sensations and no other thoughts that might pop in, but also remember that it may take a few goes before you start to really get comfortable, all the best! Sometimes just getting your experience out somewhere is really helpful
Fully agree with the very well thought out messages above.
I’m still nervous about the “putting the condom on” stage where I get in my head… but I’m virtually over it…
I make life easy by having them close at hand.
But mojo has really helped massively… it helps me relax, get out of my head, and stop spectatoring.
Once you get a few “good experiences” under your belt… confidence levels rocket… as indeed does your cock…
good luck…