Erection issues in bed, -16 yr old male

I am a 16 year old fit guy who has a girlfriend of 5 months. pretty quick off the bat we started with sexual actions, such as head, but never sex. right off the bat i realized i wasn’t hard 100%, close to like 70%. i thought it was nothing but time went across, i was still masturbating on my own couple days out of the week and sometimes watching porn. when masturbating by myself i get almost completely hard. around min to 3 of dating my girlfriend asked to have sex. i accepted and we immediately began foreplay. i was about 50% hard and she said she was going to put on a condom. she tried and immediately i went mostly soft, so it was impossible to get it on. she was angry and just went raw. even when it was in i was only about 50%. i couldn’t get it off my mind that it was effecting both of us, which led to me never cumming and 15 minutes of low tier sex. from that point on i’ve felt like shit and my confidence is in crumbles. we’ve tried twice more to do it, both times her on the other side of the bed angry feeling like she’s not pretty enough. keep in mind i was a virgin and she has had more of a past then i have. so kind of makes me thing that me not preforming to what she was used to is effecting it. but also just anxiety being told to never have sex until marriage might be effecting it. i don’t know what to do, i can’t afford the program but want to have sex with my girlfriend. i think it will push us farther apart and want to fix its. obviously i can’t get my hands on viagra or anything to help, but i don’t know any exercises to help me feel more comfortable having sex. this is making me go crazy, i feel that if i cannot pleasure her she might leave me or worse cheat on me. i need help but cant get it because i cant afford the program. any advice or exercises i can use to help my low libido and erection issues would be incredible. thank you gentlemen :pray:

i have also noticed very low libido in the way that i don’t really ever get very horny, whether sex or even masturbation. i used to get very horny and night and typically masturbate, and as of recently (noticed last week) i have only masturbate once. which is less then normal. it feels wrong and i’m unsure how to fix getting horny like i used to

Well there’s things such mental issues if you think constantly about oh I have to please her I have to perform well it’s likely you’ll do the opposite your diet could also be a big issue Im 18 and very athletic but still had troubles getting hard at times so I would consider the food you eat as a source but also there’s a definitely a chance of a std if she’s more experienced I don’t mean this too be rude but I ended up getting 2 stds that really affected my sex drive and overall health I was lucky to get curable ones but it’s probably all mental

she’s really only had 2 bodies (3 including me) but i would be incredibly surprised about an std. i try to keep a clean diet but it’s hard in my line of work

Sex has become a mental block for you by the sounds of it. You’re possibly less horny than normal because now sex is the thing that causes you anxiety. As with most things in a relationship, communication is key. Explain to her that right now, getting hard is causing you anxiety, and that is causing you in turn to lose your erection. Suggest backing off sex, concentrating on other things, and asking her what else she likes in bed. Once you know that you don’t have to get fully hard you can relax and I would imagine the issue will solve itself. There’s nothing wrong with you. I’m 36, married, and the same thing happened to me after years of brilliant sex. I spoke to my wife, which relieved her that it wasn’t an issue of attraction and allowed me to relieve the pressure of getting hard. We brought toys in, and like I said, the issue solved itself. Your block is feeling like you have to get hard, lose the block, and you can hopefully refocus on pleasure.


I’ve had this issue and it’s anxiety little buddy. You got nothing to worry about. Find something about her that turns you on and focus on that, and if that doesn’t work go down on her like you never have before. And if you never have, start now it’s important af. also lay off the porn. In my experience if you’re in a relationship it just makes expectations and performance worse. Good luck and wrap it up little dude

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