One of the great aspects of Mojo is realizing that we’re not alone in our issues. I used to get hard for more than an hour but struggle to cum. I think it stemmed from masturbating as a teen. I had no privacy so this “time to myself” was so enjoyable I didn’t want it to end too quickly. It was edging before I had even heard the term. Unfortunately it carried into adulthood. It’s been so frustrating that I started to develop ED issues recently. It’s really all in my head. I am confident that Mojo and the community will help me reset this flawed thought process. It’s funny, when it comes to sex I really am thinking with the wrong head.
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I’ve occasionally had the issue where I’m having sex for a while (over an hour) but can’t ejaculate, but now it’s been affecting me some over the last month in a new relationship.
I’ve been seeing someone and we’ve gone back to my place 3 times now. All 3 times have been incredible sex, but the last two I just can’t seem to cum. I have no issues getting hard or feeling pleasure from it, but can’t seem to get to ejaculate. Happened a couple weeks ago and I was nervous about it happening again, so I tried taking an herbal testosterone supplement the day before our next date, but it only made me feel extremely tingly in my hands and feet and didn’t do anything to help me finish.
This has somewhat affected me masturbating too, I feel like my sex drive is physically lower even though I have the desire to perform and I’m worried that this will affect my relationship with who I’m seeing right now. I just don’t know what to do.
I also take a long time to orgasm. Sometimes it takes so long I give up because I have “mind reading thought distortions” that my sexual partners are bored or disappointed.
However, when I DO finally orgasm and ejaculate, the orgasm is often a very small and unintense cresting. The lead up was way more intense and pleasurable than the actual destination. Sometimes I’m disappointed and sometimes I’m ok that the lead up took so long because I was enjoying it.
As a 53 year old who has high libido and frequent sex with multiple partners I also have very low ejaculate volume. In an ideal world I’d be a heavy leaker of pre-cum, have big intense orgasms and blow enormous loads. But… I’ve never really had any of those things so it’s not likely to start now!