Building courage to have sex with new partner

I (25M) have got a new partner (25F) lately. My previous sexual experience before this was a ONS last summer where I couldn’t get hard enough for penetrative sex. This has been playing on my mind since.

With my new partner, we have done handjobs and oral sex, but I’ve hesitated going all the way to penetrative sex. I can get hard from the handjobs and can cum multiple times in a night from them, so I don’t think it’s a biological issue. I’ve got hard from oral sex but haven’t cum from it yet.

I’m quite scared that I can only get hard and cum from handjobs and it’s stopping me from wanting to progress to penetrative sex. I really do want to have sex with this girl, as we have a great connection and I find her attractive, but there seems to be a mental blocker within me stopping me from doing it, as I don’t trust myself to get hard enough and stay hard enough.

Is there anything I can do / any tips to help overcome this? Thanks!


Hey, been dealing with the same Issue here.
I just started listening to the meditation-exercises they have here and honestly I feel a lot more confident.
I do the mediation sessions in the evening and thorughout the day I try to be as mindful as possible whenever any doubts/anxieties concerning my erection issues arise. Telling myself that those are just negative toughts, they’re not true and then proceeding with 3 positive things.

It really let’s you see the bigger picture and finally let’s you realize how all of this is just in your head, nothing else.

Another thing that may be on the more stranger side, but try masturbating and just go into the position you would be in during sex, sort of simulating a siutation but on your own. Just watch the erection, breathe in and realize how everything’s fine. Try to internalize that feeling. Kind of helped me tbh