Recently hooked up with a girl after meeting in a club. It was the first time having sex in a few months and I had been doing this program fairly consistently and was relatively confident, however I can never seem to fully get rid of that nagging voice in the back of my head, the inner critic.
During foreplay I rushed to put on the condom when I wasnât fully hard and it took me a good while to actually get hard. When I was inside I lasted like a minute. Tried for round 2 but I couldnât get it hard enough. Really discouraging, that I was ready but I was just in my head again.
I know I just have to keep going though, eventually it will get better, no point being depressed about it. Itâs all a learning curve.
Youâre right it is all a learning curve. Iâm sorry things didnât go as well as you hoped but it did sound as though you realise what wasnât helpful. You felt you rushed things, it is difficult to slow down in the moment. But amazing you were hard enough for sex and you got the condom on - that sounds really positive. Things worked but perhaps just not as well as you wanted. So perhaps next time work out how you can slow things down, spend longer getting out of your head and into your body. You could experiment - perhaps one time you could say is it ok not to penetrate? Just mess around - amazing pressure off you - and if your partner has problems with that - take a beat - itâs your needs here too. Good luck but it sounds as though you are really âgetting itâ
: )
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