Hi all,
I’ve just started and I’m in desperate need of help, after the first couple of lessons I’ve learned my issues probably stem from one bad experience. For some context, when I was 19 I got circumcised (obviously put me out of action for a bit) when I started having sex with my partner again it felt a bit odd but still good, then once my erection just disappeared, which then happened again and again, to the point now where I have zero trust in my penis and I actively avoid sex with my partner. I think part of the problem is that my partner and I are long distance so we rarely have the opportunity, now when we do I put so much pressure on myself for it to go well I’ve got no hope, so instead I focus on her and her pleasure, avoiding sex but also neglecting my own. I think I’m beginning to develop a very unhealthy relationship with sex in general, and my partner definitely knows something is up. Any help and advice would be greatly appreciated, professional or not.
Not necessarily advice but I’m in a similar position than you dude. One bad experience with my ex has snowballed into putting so much pressure on my self to get hard. I do avoid sex and when it happens put all the attention on her, which I didn’t think she feels great receiving and not giving any.
Keep at the course, I’ve only just started and can already feel myself getting more in tune with my mind and body
Don’t be afraid to have a conversation with your partner. Opening up about your anxieties could take a huge weight off your shoulders and help you back on a path to being naturally relaxed. It’s not the easiest conversation to have of course but you should be able to trust them to be considerate and understanding
I say the healthiest thing you can do is be open and converse, it’s not healthy to keep it in and bottle up the concern, it can only make it harder to become carefree and enjoying yourself again, you will get past this phase and start to enjoy sex and erections again, I have been here before and got over this bit without any meds, am know here because I struggle to maintain a hard on, luckily my wife is supportive.