Wife’s sexuality blocked by childhood trauma

First, I must say how much I got out of the content of this app. I really enjoyed the mental aspects of the training because it has helped me see myself and my sexual relationship in a new light.
However when I proposed the sensate exercise to my wife of 10 years she became anxious. She told me it reminded her of scary times in her life when she didn’t feel in control of sex. She was sexually abused as a 3-5 year old child and there have been times in our relationship where this trauma has been triggered during sexual acts previously. She also brought up that she felt concerned I had started doing the exercises from the app because she thought our sex life was going well and didn’t want to repair something which wasn’t broken. I think we have gotten over this issue but she still doesn’t want to actively study any related sexually content. I think that is because of her cultural upbringing. She is OK with trying new things in the bedroom however so I am satisfied with that.
I’m now exploring the topics of Tantra and slow sex in more detail and she has told me she is open to exploring that with me. How do I help her overcome her past trauma and allow to open up completely to me in a sexually way? Should I encourage her to talk about it? Many thanks.

1 Like

My wife and I actually figured out what triggers her traumatic memories and have come up with a safe word she can use to notify me if she’s feeling that way.