I’ve set three goals over the coming week
- No porn
- No masturbation
- 1 hour social media usage
Now I’m only just completed day two. Not long into the challenge I’m fullly aware, but I’m really struggling with GAD (general anxiety disorder).
So essentially I’m going through 4 challenges on top of my ED difficulties. Which the doctor just prescribed the blue pill.
So, I’m really struggling with my mental health and everything I’ve tried to help (breathwork, grounding, meditation, distraction) haven’t helped.
Now I feel lost and my wife doesn’t seem supportive about my mental health as she recently rolled her eyes when I mentioned breathwork to try and calm my chest pains.
I feel lost, frustrated, numb and alone and don’t know what to do. Basically I feel lost and need some help
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Mental health is a difficult challenge. You can never be on top of your mental health when you are in the midst of it. You are always in your brain so it’s hard.
It will get better though 
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11 months ago my wife kicked me out of our bedroom and into the guest room. She said if something didn’t change she was out. I had no idea I’d been checked out of my marriage for almost the entirety of it. I have a lot of work to do on my mental health, but I’ve stuck it out day after day and learned a lot about myself. It’s been very humbling. This has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But it will be worth it. Don’t do it just for your wife. Do it for you. You have to live with you , day in and day out. I wish you luck on your journey
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If you have the means, speaking with a therapist instead of just a doctor may be more where you’re at right now.
The thing about all these practices is that they are incremental in the same way that going to the gym is incremental.
They help. They add up. They matter. But the progress will often not be felt until long after it’s started to take effect.
With a therapist, though, you’d be able to better explore things like cognitive behavioural therapy—which is a component of these practices anyway—to help you actually restructure your thought patterns.
For GAD, it can be big. Creating new ways of thinking and reacting to thoughts for yourself is hard and worthwhile to start experiencing the world in a better way.
Above all: please, if you begin to feel too low or alone, seek professional support right away.
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Well, today has been another hard one. I was feeling an attack coming on so I did a grounding exercise and I ended up crying. Something I haven’t done since my Dad passed away 15 years ago. I’m not exactly sure what caused the crying, but I bawled for about 30mins and afterwards felt empty, weak and exhausted.
Keep at it brother.
A man with an unsupportive spouse is one of the loneliest people in the world.
The most important thing is to go easy on yourself. Your plan to quit the things you did to get back your all round health is a great one, but don’t forget you’ve also quite cold turkey all the things you use to self soothe. So, the increased anxiety and inability to regulate is the initial stages of withdrawing from all those usual coping mechanisms. Your body is trying to cope by sending the chemicals it knows that usually gets you to regulate in hopes you will. Eventually though, your mind does rewire to learn how to get wha tit needs from other things. While you are in this period, find other positive outlets to occupy your mind. Sometime that helps for awhile or sometimes it just gets you through a few minutes, but they add up. And I agree with what was said before: do this for YOU. The strong version of you carries himself different and that what was attracted your partner in the first place and they probably want that person back. And, if not, that version of you will make YOU feel good about yourself which will make you attractive to others as well. Either way, you come out ahead. Good luck and take care of yourself and please seek help if it does feel too overwhelming.
Well I’ve managed to finish my challenge and plan to continue as long as possible. To be honest, it was difficult for the first couple of days, but then it got surprisingly easy. Worryingly too easy.
Due to this cold turkey I’ve noticed I have zero desire/labido and I’m not even thinking about anything sexual in nature. I’ve only had one weak morning wood too and no spontaneous erections.
I understand it’s going to take time for my body to recalibrate so I’m not too worried about that at the moment.
It’s my GAD that’s affecting me the most. I feel completely stuck and keep going round in circles trying to find some form of help.
My biggest issue I can’t pin point what exactly I’m worrying about.