I split up last year from my partner of 19 years. The last 9 years of that relationship were sexless and I received no emotional warmth, no contact other than anything initiated by me and even that was extremely limited to a peck on the cheek or touching hands. Everything else was discouraged. She had a long term medical condition that meant that occasionally I took on the role of a carer, she might be a bedridden for three weeks, maybe once or twice a year. during which time I would need to turn her in bed, carry her to the bathroom, change the bedsheets after an “accident”, continue to work, try to function.
I was “caught” masturbating a couple of times and made to feel guilty, told how wrong it was, how it made her feel less towards me. I was punished by cessation of contact. I loved her and cared for her during difficult medical times and always hoped things would improve emotionally.
I received no acknowledgement of anything I did, and every mistake I made was highlighted and an issue made of it. My need for any sexual relief was ignored yet I was made to feel it was all my fault and that masturbating had affected the our relationship.
I discovered she had put spyware on my computer, she made me park my car in view of the security camera so that she could remotely monitor my movements to and from work. I paid for everything whilst her earnings went into her savings. The house was hers and I was reminded of that fact constantly. I was becoming nothing. Trapped.
I became depressed and anxious and this triggered PTSD. I turned to mental health services when I planned suicide.
Counselling helped me regain my feelings of worth and I was able to break from the relationship. At 64, I came away with nothing. But I had a sense of me.
A couple of months ago I met a wonderful woman. Emotionally everything we both need, tactile, caring, open, honest, trusting.
I am unable to get an erection, and my anxiety during foreplay grew, yet my partner is incredibly supportive and understanding. I saw my doctor, and reduced my medication, I worked on mindfulness, I discovered and began working with this app which has increased my understanding and awareness.
Last week we were able to have sex to her and my total satisfaction. My erection is still unpredictable in size and duration, but their is now hope.
Congratulations! You deserve happiness and sexual fulfillment. Very happy for you!
Good on you for realising the no win situation you were in and ending it. You have inner strength and integrity and have come through the worst with a better sense of yourself. You’re on the right path and I wish you well.
Brother, I had a similar situation tho not nearly as rough as yours…
Months ago I met a wonderful, sexy, adventurous, caring and supportive woman. She’s a so supportive and encouraging of my ed. She’s never had a man love her or make love to her the way I’ve been able to. We’ve only actually had P/V sex a few times but she cums multiple times whenever we get physical. I’m finally free to explore all forms of sex, eroticism and even found a couple kinks I didn’t realize I had…. Apparently I’m a foot guy… 
It’s great to hear another story of a guy getting into a new GREAT relationship!!
Congrats!