Never wrote in here before but seems like a really supportive place so here goes.
I’m a 30 year old male, and have had some ED/libido issues for some time now. It seems to follow a similar pattern but as I’m getting older it’s definitely gotten worse. I never ever wake up with an erection and I’m so in my own head I always struggle to maintain erections. Problem is, I’ve met the woman of my dreams and after putting in some pretty good performances the first few times, the ED is setting in a little. I’m so anxious about not really being horny anymore. I don’t know what to do about it!
When I was younger I was SO excitable and I used to ejaculate super quick and never ever had an issue with erections, but since my mid twenties and depression, now, I unfortunately do.
Has anybody had a similar experience of very low libido? Or recovering?? (Would love to think I could get my sex drive back).
It’s even made me doubt my own sexuality, I’ve never fantasised over men or find them attractive, but part of me is now saying well am I gay?! But I love women and I don’t fancy men!! Arrhhh, so confusing.
Anyway, hopefully someone can help as I feel really lost and alone.
I forgot where I read this, but someone said if you’re not waking up with an erection it probably means that your sleep is off. Are you getting at least 7-8 hours of sleep? I’ve heard 7.5 hours is ideal. Consider some supplements even if you are. Magnesium comes to mind as one that helps sleep. Cold exposure may help too, either a minute or two of cold water at the end of your shower or an ice pack on the neck and back at night before bed. Invest in black out curtains as well, and put electrical tape over LED in your room.
Meditation and mindfulness hep a lot too. Clear your head and try to focus on just doing one thing at a time. Maybe listen to music during a workout or while doing some mundane housekeeping, but try not to overstimulate yourself throughout your day (I recently quit listening to podcasts) and you might start noticing your mind free to wander to more horny thoughts.
As far as what’s covered in Mojo one thing I wish I discovered through the app was the guided masturbation. I don’t think I need specifically someone telling me how to touch myself, but not using the same routine and taking my time and considering other forms of touch and not simply the “death grip” has been a game changer for me.