Long term relationship with new onset ED

Been dealing with psychological ED for 6 months. Healthy relationship for 3 years, engaged, and now it feels like it’s on the brink before our wedding later this year. And I feel like it’s all because of me because I got shocked, nervous and scared when I couldn’t get it up 6 months ago. Been a struggle since. I feel good doing the exercises and meditating but get super nervous, anxious when leading up to a possible sexual encounter. Any tips?

Box breath has helped me a bit. But I’m still learning and new to mojo.

I feel ya: Know that this can, and does happen to guys in long relationships all the time. Last Fall, after 24 years of marriage, suddenly I was having problems getting it up… and over 6 months they got steadily worse. We’re still in love and still find each other sexy… so what’s with that?

After checking in with the doc (I’m pushing 60 after all) - and he cleared all the systems as good, I had to conclud it was all in the head!

I’ve been doing Mojo for a month now and it is definitely helping! Not getting it up 100% of the time, but at least some times now! Which is way better than the the 0% I was hitting two months ago!

Hey buddy. I have put a link to a long post I wrote about my struggles which sound similar to yours (Trying for a baby, IVF and psychological erectile dysfunction). I know it’s incredibly frustrating but I found recently that things spontaneously started to improve. It’s difficult to say which thing helped so I think it must be a culmination of different things (psychosexual therapy, meditation, and reading about it). I have stayed away from viagra because I don’t think it has any role in psychological ED.

Patience. Perseverance. And dedication to the techniques described on MOJO. It HAS worked for me, I noticed a real improvement after a few months of MOJO and intermittently it does still happen but it’s better than before.

For a psychological block its a psychological solution. Read about other people’s experiences. Have confidence in yourself that it has happened before and will happen again.

Taking it really slow is also a big help. Try for one or two nights asking your partner to take penetrative sex completely off the table and doing lots of other things, it takes all pressure off you and you can both enjoy something else.

Make sure she is reassured that it is nothing to do with her.

Let me know how it goes.

I hear you, man. Though I haven’t been with my current partner for as long, anxiety, self doubt, and catastrophizing have started a struggle with psychological ED. I’ve only started using Mojo, but I’ve noticed some promising results already. As others in this thread have said, this stuff takes time to overcome and cannot be fixed over night.

Don’t let this define you as a man, or as a lover. If your partner is understanding and open to experimentation, there’s no end to what you two could do together. Sex isn’t just about penetration; we’re repeatedly told that’s what sex is supposed to be. But you can have a fulfilling and satisfying sex life without penetration or erections while you figure this all out.

Just remember that this too shall pass.