In my head way too much

I usually take long to ejaculate and it’s never been a problem for hookups but now I’m dating and the woman I’m with thinks she is the problem. Never really thought about it until then and now I seem to be so focused on cumming that I start getting soft. This experience scared me into thinking I had a problem to where now I’m just stressing out over staying hard to where now that is my main concern. The first night we fucked for 30 minutes and I didn’t cum. The next week I thought about cumming too much and went soft so we talk about it and she said she didn’t expect me to cum and just like that, I came all over her and the morning after as well. Still thinking I may have this problem, it stayed with me the next week and shot me down again, putting me right back into this cycle. I have no trouble with erections during foreplay or anything for that matter but the second we start having sex, I start overthinking and everything stops. Making appointments for therapy and doctor visits in hopes that it’s just mental.