Hi guys, I am 36 and have a beautiful wife. We have had a good sex life until recently where I developed Ed and stumbled across this app.
I have been addicted to porn and masturbation since childhood. Anytime I am alone, my mind convinces me to watch porn and masturbate. This has happened even after marriage and am currently doing the same. However, now I feel guilty and shameful whenever I do it since I am more attracted to this than having sex with my wife. This has ruined my sexual appetite and also I fantasize in my mind while having sex. Also, I feel less energetic once done however somehow I feel compelled to do it when I am alone.
Any advice from anyone who is able to overcome this? I have read porn in moderation is ok. Cold turkey would be difficult I presume. I want to get rid of this since it starts guilt within me but unable to do it. Any suggestions would be appreciated
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I am 25 years old, i have a beautiful gorgeous girlfriend who i been with 4 years now. She was everything i desired in s girl, body and face a 10. But just like you, i had been addicted to porn and masterbating since a kid. Our sex life was great at the beginning, for some reason i didnt crave pornography or masterbating while in the early stages of our relationship. It was around year 3 is where i started to crave some new stuff and i fell into the porn rabbit hole. I was so addicted i also preferred to masterbate to this made up reality in my phone rather than fuck my girlfriend whos ass is so fat and round any guy would love a chance. I took it for granted, but i found myself distancing myself from her. Thats where i developed ed because of the shame and guilt i also had for being a porn addict. Porn had ruined our sex life between us. It made our relationship hang by a thread because of my ed. She had believed she wasnt pretty enough for me, that she didnt satisfy me anymore. She believed that i had found someone else better looking snd have been cheating on her. She believed that our 4 year relationship was as coming to an end as we always would talk about our future together and our goals we want to complete together. She believed i was not interested in her anymore. And to me it was hard and shameful because all of this, was going downhill because of pornography that she didnt know about. We almost had a break up, after shes been dealing w my ed. She had came to conclusion that she wasnt making me happy anymore. And i couldnt let her go because of my guilty pleasure of porn. It broke my heart that the love of my life thought she needed to let me go to be happy somewhere else. But that day i told her about my upbringing of my sexual life. And how hard it was for me to stop thinking ab porn. And how i would masterbate behind her back. I came clean, i told her about it. My anxiety in bed my expectations were ruined because of porn. That day i quit porn and masterbating cold turkey. Its been 2 months now and our sex life has significantly improved. Im telling you all this because i too believe you can overcome this obstacle, by talking to ur wife ab ur addiction. Because addiction only grows more in the dark.
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Ever since i gave up porn snd masterbating, we had great sex. Dont get me wrong, since the first time my dick wouldn’t get hard during foreplay. It has planted a seed of spectating. But thats why im here on this app, because i want tonlearn more on how to rewire my brain. I get anxious still and i tell her about it. Somehow someway im still able to get hard snd fuck great. But i wish i didnt have to deal w the pre sex anxiety still. You have hope man. This app has been helping me alot.
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Yeah I echo the other chap above. I couldn’t tell my wife for so long because I knew it would hurt her. But actually, it was the best thing I ever did. She’s been supportive and understanding and we’re battling it together. Now I have accountability and the habit is in the light, it’s so much easier to fight. Addictions and bad habits thrive in darkness and secrecy. Brining it into the light makes it so much easier to tackle. It’s been about 2/3 weeks now, and I have felt so much lighter. My wife has said how I’m like the old me again. And it’s been so much easier to fight the temptation to watch porn. Tell your wife, it’s moments like these that strengthen a marriage. Keeping it in the dark will only continue to push you apart.
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I’m going through the same thing. There’s a lot I could talk about but the thing that has helped me most is realising that my desire for sex and masturbation (my sex drive, if you will) is actually different to my desire to watch porn. When I felt the pull to watch porn, I questioned whether it was the release of masturbation, or was it the porn watching itself. I realised it was the latter, so I was curious as to why I felt I needed to watch porn. It may be because I was bored, or was avoiding something. That helped me put some distance been the thought and my automatic reaction to watch porn. I could then ask myself if there is something I would rather do that would be more helpful and meaningful - do some exercise, connect with a friend, or maybe do the thing I was avoiding 
. It’s tough, but you can do it!
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Cold turkey is the only way. Good shit man. I had a similar situation myself with my wife.
Until I broke up with my wife, we didn’t have sex for literally years. She totally went off it. I would regularly masturbate to porn and sometimes be on my phone for hours.
A couple of years ago, I met my girlfriend. It wasn’t until we got into bed that I realised I had ED. In short, I signed up to mojo in March of this year and have made a concerted effort to avoid porn. I’ve found that this makes me hornier towards my girlfriend. Sex between us might not yet be as good as I’d like it to be, but porn is now off the menu. Sometimes after I’ve made her cum, I might masturbate afterwards at the thought of this. I suppose what I’m saying is if you lay off the porn, and you CAN do this, you’ll begin to focus on attraction and being more physical with your partner.