I just can’t focus on sex with my partner. We start and I’m in the zone then other thoughts pop in my head and I lose the erection and sometimes can’t get it back. Which is so frustrating to me and her.
Maybe the argument was not coincidental. Maybe there were a lot of emotions you and or your partner were subconsciously feeling about the situation…?
“I’ll never have sex with enough women to feel validated because I can’t get it up when I do”. I now realise that it’s not about the numbers but about experiencing the delight of sex with different people until I know what I like.
This is the exact issue I am turning around… I don’t have a problem getting an erection, my wife is super hot, amazing body, and we have great sex, but once we get going, I have been getting in my head and then I lose my erection. But, this is exactly what I am changing!
“Why I keep ejaculating so early”, I now understand it’s a mixture of over arousal, anxiety, and a negative relationship with sexual relationships, all of which can be controlled and understood better to better control my sex life
It can all feel like a rollercoster of a ride, from not being to get hard at all, normally due to anxiety, to other times being hard as a rock but struggling to shoot, or other times getting hard and shooting too fast. All can happen so randomly though it’s fair too say the issue boils down too self confidence, over thinking and anxiety.
One thought I can re-program is “I won’t get hard during sex”. I don’t always know that. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. Box breathing helps calm me down.
I’ll never be able to get hard ever again
I lose it more often than staying hard. I’ll enjoy it and breathe and I’ll get harder more often than not
I can’t believe it’s happening again. But I have done it way more than I haven’t, I will be able to. I am able to.
I couldn’t get it up twice in a row. I didn’t meet her needs and I’m scared of being intimate with her now. This was my thinking and asked for some alone time to figure it out. She broke up with me on the spot. I wish I had thought More positively because I had had sex with her 100+ times before.
I have a new sexual partner and I’ve never had an issue with ED… until now. I like this girl ALOT, she is so kind and fun and gentle and caring. She’s been nothing but supportive the two times we have tried to have sex and I haven’t been able to get it hard or keep it hard… I worry now EVERYTIME that she is disappointed or that she will not want to progress this any further because of this, but I really like her so I want it to keep going.
I can still satisfy her with my tongue but she feels she can’t satisfy me and it’s seemingly effecting her confidence in herself now too…
Have a very similar situation, felt like the more I love or care of the person the more I’ve becoming cautious, afraid of not performing therefore losing her, whereas in the past with sex only partner, I don’t felt a thing I just do it, no issue or what sort ever, not sure whether it is a self pressure that I put onto myself
The last time that I had sex, it was with a friend and she told me that she wanted me to fuck her. This made me anxious and felt pressure to be perform really good and it made me start to think about not being able to meet the assumed expectation.
The last time I attempted sex with my girlfriend it instantly brought back memories of the first few times we tried… which all went really badly. She is understanding always but I feel like I’m not good enough so I’m just avoiding trying penetrative sex altogether now, as I’m afraid of failing again
I worry that my being soft my husband will think I am not enjoying things even when I am. My erections go up and down. We do have fun times even in this situation.
I have been cumming early for years. Sometimes on entry. She always tells me it’s okay but I’m struggling to believe her now. Sex is less frequent, I was getting better for a little while. Now I’ve lost connection to my body and have to concentrate to get hard or ask her to help
A thought I can reprogram is that I won’t cum during sex, I do not know if i will or not so it’s unfair to myself to think that before it even happens
I keep telling myself i wont be able to get an erection after it happened my first time, and now every time the opportunity arises i tell myself that ill fail to get an erection and it then happens (fortune telling)
I’ve came earlier than usual twice recently, and I’m starting to think that it’s become a problem, and that she isn’t satisfied