I have had some relationships in the past that have really messed with my head regarding sexual encounters.
My first sexual girlfriend would get really angry if she didnāt cum so I started to believe that if she didnāt cum I had āfailed.ā
Later on into my adult life I was very sexually healthy and was hosting tantric workshops with a girl I was seeing and over time the relationship turned psychologically abusive and destroyed my connection to my own sexual energy. I abandoned my tantric path and gave up sexual relationships for almost 2 years. Until I found my latest girlfriend.
Things started out really well and it was passionate and happy. But over time I felt pushed away and unwanted physically. I couldnāt turn her on anymore, and she never made an advance toward me. For many reasons aside from that I left and am back working on healing.
I want to feel that playful and explorative sexual energy that I once had again, and am excited to get there!