This is my relationship as well.
Seems like you have more issues to address in your relationship than just libido and e.d. maybe try and give it a go to explore what her issues are within the relationship.
If she is wanting to receive love as service (dishes, etc) and you provide that, then she is getting her needs fulfilled. If you want to receive love as physical affection and she is not providing that, then there is an imbalance there that needs addressing.
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I’d kinda tried this in the past, but made the mistake of not telling my partner that I was trying something new and wanted her to do it with me. I did the dumb thing of assuming she would pick up on my more forward approach and see that as sexy. I got the reaction described in the video of “Um, what’s going on here?” And received no increase in affection back. Will give it a go with my partner on board first.
Happy to try solo simmering and see how it improves my libido.
Excited to try solo simmering and see how it helps me
I’ve done this sub consciously, wjen me and my partner visited NYC last year through out the museum of modern art (which we only visited because of the starry night gotta rep my own country) we kept touching each other sonetimes just lovingly or when no one was looking i squeezed her butt stuff like that. This worked amazingly but i never made the connection.
i try it though im trying to quit P and it makes it more difficult
Happy to try it, my partner actually talked to me about this but didn’t call it simmering. Just too dense to pick up on it
Excited to try this, sound like a good way to lower sexual anxiety as well.
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Thinking about what i will say to them.
I’m going to start by introducing this to my wife. I’m sure she will be totally on board with this. I’m going to kiss her passionately, instead of just a quick peck and an I love you…
I’m single but if I know that a sexual encounter is coming up I’ll fantasize about that person throughout the day before having sex.
Very intrigued to see how my partner reacts to this idea. Hopefully they’ll be interested in doing it.
I’ll make every kiss a real kiss, I’ll make eye contact more often and hold it just a little longer, I’ll touch her more often.
Notice a woman that I find attract.
Remember attractive / sexual moments.
Savour a nice smell.
Fantasize about woman I’m dating.
Solo simmering with fantasies about the girl im dating
Honestly my current girlfriend is always on my mind and we are always on a hot simmer.
I’ve already started to simmer with my wife, and it’s great. We are talking more, about anything and everything. We are laughing more, and we are cuddling more. It’s exciting. I guess I got too far into the all-o-nothing approach to sex and forgot what the bit (lot) in the middle could feel like.
Solo simmering until my avoidant ex decides he wants to participate, or I find someone to simmer with.