First time having sex since starting Mojo

Finally had sex for the first time since starting Mojo! A little backstory…divorced in November, had a couple of failed attempts with women from dating apps, started to get really anxious about sex.

So, last night wasn’t perfect, but I was a big improvement from the last attempt. I was able to be present during foreplay, got a nice strong erection, intercourse with some oral thrown in to make it last longer.

Midway through, I got in my head, started thinking about how this woman’s body and sex was different than my ex. went limp while inside her. Instead of freaking out with all or nothing thinking, I just laid beside her and cuddled, kissed, did some sensual touching. Boom, I was back at it and we both finished :raised_hands:t3:

Strategies that worked for me:

I told her before hand that I’d had a few failed attempts before this and that I’d appreciate it if she could be patient with me. I assured her I think she’s beautiful and that sometimes I get anxious, and it’s not her at all. She was very sweet about it, and if she’d been judgmental, I was ready to pass. If a woman isn’t understanding about my journey with intimacy, she doesn’t deserve to get with me.

Wax/wane. When I lost my errection, I remembered wax/wane exercises and told myself, it’s all good. You’ll get it back up. And I did.

Mindfulness. After losing the erection, I paused and just focused on feeling her body, her curves, her nice round butt. I noticed what it was like to kiss her, feel her skin, smell her hair, the sounds she made when I touched her certain ways. I got present with her.

Sensate. I knew where to tell her to touch me to turn me on, which I learned during solo sensate. I see the value of that exercise now. I put her hands where I wanted them and that helped a lot.

Brothers, this stuff works. I appreciate everyone’s support. Keep at it, and I intend to do the same. My goal is to get to a point where I’m present through the entire experience and fully in my body. Onward!

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Hell ya……congrats bro….its a great feeling after you achieve a win like that

Wow! Thanks for sharing what worked, keep it up!

Fucking amazing, proud of you brother.

This is motivating to read. Seems like this is almost more of a success story than just a straight-up (no pun intended) successful sex session…you deployed the techniques and got back in the game and made it work. This gives me hope for myself!

Good to hear. I’m happy for you.