Do you ever get anxious during sex? How does it affect you? (Part 2)

For most of the time. I find myself trying to get aroused by the other person but i find myself to be very nervous.

it stops my boner and the ability to pleasure myself or my partner

Yes I start to think my du

I start to think I’m not big enough, wonder about smell,

I think I have some kind of performance anxiety. Not necessarily worrying that I’ll be bad in bed, but sometime worrying that my partner will just “suffer through it”. I sometime also have no idea.


I am 24 and have had issues usually with one time hook ups or with people who I’m not necessarily comfortable with. When it happens I feel like less of a man because I can’t perform in such a basic natural way. I feel bad because it makes my partner self conscious about themselves and feel the need to lie and say I’m sick. It makes me feel terrible and less interested in trying to have sex again because of the fear of this happening again.

i definitely get anxious. i just wanna please the person that i’m with and not feel like i’m letting them down. being like this has made me let them down and i can’t do it again. i wanna get better. i wanna believe i can get better. this means so much to me. i have to fix myself. hopefully this is the right place to start.

I have been with someone for maybe half a year now and never had a problem until a few weeks ago. Now it’s the only thing I think about weather I will be able to get it up or not. I have so much attraction for this girl and I just get in my head too much the past few days and can’t control it.


I always bottomed because I always thought that I was not going to be able to get hard enough for penetration!

There have been points in my life, where it has failed on me but they where always one offs… From 15/16 it usually was never an issue, I have had full 5 year relationship where it never failed and we hated eachother. I didn’t care weather I pleased her or not it was all for me.
My new relationship though. I care what she thinks. It’s important to note that she has been so supportive becuase she knows it isn’t like me. We joke about how if this happened in the first year it would be a different story but for a while she thought it was her, she thought she wasn’t good enough but that is so wrong. I feel like I’m starving, like there is a big juicy steak Infront of me and my hands are cut off and my mouth is sowed shut.
I WANT her but I can’t have her.

Now nearly 5 years in too my next relationship with a woman I worship, like I am not joking. every curve ever inch is perfect. She is such a woman. And I think that is where the issue lies. I think I need to lay it out and say that she has straight up told me I’m the best she’s ever had, and that all her top 5 experiences are with me… Even in the past either by luck or by genuine know how I CAN satisfy any woman. So it deffinetly isn’t me doubting my ability. Or is it. I don’t know… Side tracked… So through our relation ship we have had great sex like it was a whole problem for years that I lasted to long and she couldn’t handle it… So I started trying to… Cum faster… we then hit a rough patch where we broke up but where still very much together and one day… Chink it all goes wrong. Like she just looked so fucking beautiful and at the time I was at a very low point, I was doubting myself in life, losing my woman (not becuase of sex, those issues came during the break up)
I could see other guys where grabbing her attention, more successful guys… But I always told myself “I’m a beast in bed” (I know most guys do but it’s took years for me to believe it) so doesn’t matter where they are at in life they can never give her what I do… And then it’s broke.

She was sat there looking so god damn perfect and the only good thing I had going for me is broken.

There was a few months where everything was working fine with occasional failure. She ended up pregnant everything was amazing and then the worst possible thing happened, we lost the baby and since then it’s been getting worse and worse.

It’s always on my mind, it’s consuming my every thought like straight up. She makes me so aroused but in the heartbeat it takes to get from foreplay to position it’s gone and my heart is practically beating out if my chest and not in the way it should be…

During foreplay I become anxious or almost resigned to the fact that I will be unable to get an erection, which gets me down and makes me feel like I am disappointing my partner.

Yes. I lose my boner.

I used to be extremely sexually active and never really worried about it. I started taking an antidepressant and it affected me physically and then I got a new antidepressant and I was able to have errections. However I have contributed to get in my own head about it and therefore I think it is all in my head.

I feel like I’m constantly in my head and thinking will I even get an erection, this feeds into my performance anxiety.

It makes me feel like shit and ashamed.

Anxious leading up. I’m 57 been married 25 years and a couple years back I had a couple instances where I couldn’t get an erection and that has snow-balled into performance anxiety. My wife is very understanding and makes our environment comfortable but my brain just gets in the way. I have all the helper stuff, Cialis and I’m on Testosterone therapy and my T count is 800. I’m just all in my head and I know. Nocturnal erections are common for me but I even struggle with masturbation.

I’ve always had some level of struggle with this, but usually the issue would resolve itself with my partners long-term. However, the thought of losing my erection is ALWAYS in my head, even if things seem to be going well. I’ve learned other techniques to please to counter this, but I want the feeling of pure, strong erections for every sexual encounter. Hopefully Mojo helps.

I go through phases of it happening. Sometimes I’ll be good for weeks, other weeks will be bad. It ends up in a cycle of fearing it will happen makes it happen

Yeah for sure, it starts before I even get to the room. I have thoughts of jeez, should I take a pill just to be sure, is it going to work this time, it never spirals to super dark depths or anything, but the thoughts are always there