Holding it in too much

Has anyone, had this issue. When starting to have sex, I feel the urge to cum very quickly, so I sort of keep it in. It’s like I have the orgasm without ejaculating. Then, since I sorta orgasmed, I lose my erection going forward. Don’t want to cum to quick because I want to enjoy the moment and make sure I can’t please my women, but then it not any better cause I cannot continue anyways. Sometime I can prevent from ejaculating this way and continue for much longer. Almost seem like I need to find the sweet spot. Anybody has had this happen to them?