My inner critic sounds like me, it’s essentially my subconscious speaking to me like he has my whole life, but in this case he starts saying things like don’t mess it up or I focus on other things and not on my partner
My inner critic I think dates back to the numerous times I was about to have sex, but the situations in itself perhaps limited me actually getting up and penetrating (ie. At a party, someone else was in the room, too drunk). So I think this constant times of not getting it up has caused repetition and a road block in my head. Also finishing top early has always been a constant thought since it’s been too long…
“What’s wrong with me? Are you not even interested?” idk if covid had a real effect on me as well since being away from people for so long effected my time in bed. It’s honestly so frustrating, something I wouldn’t want anyone to go through. I’ve always been embarrassed as well in what my partner would think of me… Would she not be attracted to me anymore because of it?
- worried about staying hard
- when i am hard worried about ejaculating quickly
- sometimes my inner voices pretends to be other people and makes me imagine what other people would be doing in this situation makes me question whether im normal
- my inner voice is a ■■■■ and will be muted soon
After I have been able to maintain an erection for what seems like just more than long enough to have already cum, my inner critic is like, “you should have already come, what is going on? You might want to just pretend to cum. If you do that, it will spare you the inevitable embarrassment that will occur when you start to go soft while thrusting in her.” Sometimes I will fake cumming (which is embarrassing to MYSELF), sometimes I will have to stop after eventually going soft from my inner critic’s words boring into my brain (which is embarrassing to me and my wife), and sometimes I will successfully ejaculate (and on those occasions my inner critic will say, “Congtatulations, I’m so glad you had success…. THIS TIME.” And I begin the self-doubt all over and part of me thinks the success was a lucky fluke).
my inter critic is me telling me what I can and can not do that I am not able to keep an erection due to my body I want to perform well for my self and my partner in the beginning I can stay erect bUt after awhile self doubt kills my erection some times I can get it back
My inner critic is me, just a much more confident know-it-all version. He knows my weaknesses for sure.
I ended up picturing my inner critic as a worm with a tuxedo shouting at me you got to keep it up and hard.
My inner critic is a smaller, less confident, snivelling version of me. He wears an I’ll fitting grey suit and has nasal sounding voice. Whenever my thoughts turn to sex he is there sowing doubt - “you won’t be able to get it up.” “It’ll end quickly.” “Just stick to foreplay.” “If you just go down on her you’ll be safe.” “You aren’t satisfying her.” “She loves to less because you can’t.”
He remains in my head before, during and after sex. Making these negative statements and taking some of the enjoyment out of sex.
My inner critic stemmed from my early 20’s of what I thought sex should be like based on porn I had watched.
Having to have penetrative sex for 30 minutes or more.
Making sure she is pleased and reaching orgasm once or several times, combined with seeing men with big penis’s which made me question am I big enough. I set unrealistic expectations and they have stuck.
Coupled with being put down by my ex only made the problem worse.
That was an interesting experience. First of all, the voice was my own. In fact, the way I visualised the inner critic was myself, hovering over my right shoulder, wearing a button-up shirt, unfitted jeans and a pair of white sneakers. The interesting part is that when I took my awareness away from that person, I was in an emotional state. Good exercise.
It was hard to get clear on my inner critic I guess it’s a general sense I’m going to fail. I can see how it would be more helpful to tell myself there’s no way to fail
Mine is a mix between a physical sensation and my own voice rather clinically telling me i have failed to get fully erect before so why would I manage it now
It’s telling me you may get it up but it’s not going to stay there.
My inner critic drives my fear and it’s terrible I imagine failing
Anyone else imagine an abusive ex as their critic? I imagined a character from an anime came in and did like 1000 sword slashes to dice them up into pieces. Weird? Idk. Day one…
The inner crtitic has my voice. And it’s constantly nagging me during sex. Sometimes actively holding me back, sometimes daring me to get it up. When that does not work it goes into a ‘told you so’ - mode.
Before sex I tell myself, that its ok. That i don’t need to get hard. Thats based on previous good-willed girls, that where very understanding. That does not help though and I remember really bad encounters. its just too much thinking all the time
My inner critic starts hours before sex and if it’s a weekend planned then it starts a few days prior. Same thing, I’m thinking about our time together and already sabotaging myself. When it gets to our physical time, no matter what I do, what she does, it’s not working. Oddly enough if I masturbate when I’m alone, I’m hard for as long as I need to be. It’s frustrating because I’m a very sexual person but it seems when a partner is included, everything dies
My inner critic doesn’t feel like it’s own voice. It feels like me. It reminds me of how I’m hard on myself in most situations in life and how I hold myself to unreasonable standards. Most of all, my inner critic is an embodiment of self doubt. You won’t be good. They won’t enjoy it. You aren’t doing it right. You aren’t as good as other people they’ve had. You weren’t good enough for someone in the past so you must just not be good.
My inner critic hides where I can’t see him. I’ve always been self critical, but my inner critic takes that to a whole new level. On an ever greater scale than sex he’s constantly whispering this relationship isn’t going to workout or that this girl is going to hurt me. That then extends to him telling me I won’t be able to get hard, Hours, DAYS before the encounter occurs. He tells me I won’t be good enough and that’ll she’ll leave because I’m not good enough. But yknow what, it’s a great thing that he’s wrong and not real
During sex, my inner critic is trying to prepare me for the worst. To tell me that I’m not going to get hard so look for an out. It feels like anxious friend poking at me