My inner critic has my voice trying to pull me down telling me how I’m gonna fail this time
Basically reminds me of all the past failures on either going soft during sex or not getting fully erect from the start.
When I first think about a sexual encounter I get a twitch in my groin. But then as time gets closer and I need initiate I get worried and my inner critic kicks in. It’s my own voice in my head.
It says this isn’t going to work, Its not the right time, you might smell, she might not be ready, she’s not in the mood, your too tired, you haven’t been nice, she was mean to you etc etc. So many reasons not to go through with initiating. During sex I just keep hearing things like it’s going to go soft. It’s my own voice, it’s what always happens, evebthough it’s not always. She’s not enjoying it like you think she is. You are a disappointment. It’s aweful.
It is my mom saying to my dad that he couldn’t please her sexually. Which lead to her leaving her kid for another relationship. The inner critic attaches sex to abandonment. When I’m going limp the voice says see you are just like your dad. abandonment is around the corner. I need to hear.
I am not my dad
She is not my mom
I don’t need to fear being abandoned
Definitely am focused on staying hard and then not coming to quickly. Is a vicious cycle. I would like to be more confident in both.
My inner critic calls me things like “not a man” or says things like “are you even straight” or “if you like this girl, why aren’t you hard for her, she wants you, and now you’re making her feel bad” or “she’s going to leave you if you can’t get hard”
My inner critic sounds like me. It’s me telling myself to get hard, get in the mood because I don’t want to let my partner down again. It starts right before foreplay and keeps nagging all the way through.
As soon. Oh shit. They say this immediately
My inner critic only comes out when it’s time to preform it feels me up with doubt , makes me not feel worthy enough , makes me feel like my penis is not big enough , makes me feel like I will let down my parent always.
My inner critic is almost always there not only in the time around sex, but throughout my daily life. It only got worse in sexual encounters after I lost my erection during the act.
Doubting whether she will be interested or shut me down immediately. Fear that if she is interested that I won’t be able to perform
My inner critic often comes from a good place. Often bringing up past traumatic events.
For example it might say remember how that person reacted to seeing your body… well this person might do the same
My inner critic tells me that just like every other time I won’t be able to get it up. Then that I have let my partner down and I should be embarrassed
My inner critic is my failure to get hard at my first time when I was 18 years old. I constantly remind myself that night and can’t get it out of my head.
This is the first time I am looking at my inner critic, and I saw it as myself talkin in my head. Before going into sex he will say something like don’t screw up today but I can’t stop focusing on my penis, and if it did not get as hard as I want I will feel really bad and think oh I f*ck up again.
My inner critic has a voice just like mine and proceeds to tell me not to do things and or that I’m not good enough, like, don’t go limp, why aren’t you hard you should be hard what’s wrong with you etc etc
I Grew up extremely religious and sex before marriage was not a thing. Since I’m still not married (because I’m gay) I’ve often had feelings of inadequacy and have a hard time being fully “in the moment” because of me feeling undeserving or like I’m doing something displeasing to God
It’s just me, a critical pessimistic me, observing the situation, but pointing out flaws in the second person, or saying things like ‘you’re not going to get hard’
My inner critic tells me there’s no way you’re going to get it up and there’s no point in trying. It says I’m better off just pretending nothings wrong and that thinking about or trying to have sex is the problem.
Questioning, too meh. Needs to get into the moment more.